Taylor Pangman

life is simultaneously slowing down and speeding up these days
i’m ricocheting between the still frame of a newborn
and the endless
boundless
wave that is a kindergartener
trying not to stay too long in one place
unable to stay too long in one place
desperately wanting to stay in one place
this place
right here
this fleeting moment where if i’m not careful
i won’t notice it might just be the best day of my life.
if i want it to be.

life is more romantic these days
like poetry.

dirty diapers
early bedtimes
and my lover
he is a foot away but it takes me hours to reach him.

these fleeting moments where if i’m not careful
i won’t notice it might just be the best day of my life.
if i want it to be.

——
i took this photo in the bathroom this morning. a rare moment of quiet and stillness. i found myself rushing through the motions. then i looked up. saw this shadow on the wall and it stilled me. after a rough night of sleep i had been moving in survival mode. just going through the motions. at first the shadows registered as a picture. but as i slowed down and kept my body still i noticed it had the tiniest bit of movement to it. the leaves that cast the shadow were ever so slightly moving. dancing. a smile crept on my face and i suddenly had the urge to write. i haven’t felt that in awhile. with so little time for myself these days, writing has felt like a luxury i don’t have right now. but these words just poured out of me, like a symphony inside my mind, i started composing. i used to write pages, but maybe at this phase in my life, this new me, mama of 2, i’m learning how to get to the point a lot faster. i’m stripping out the fluff. and it feels good….more to come i hope❤️