R3llie

Being a self-taught musician means I’ve created all my songs by ear 👂🏼.

Even though I haven’t released music in a while, I haven’t stopped making it ~I’ve been focusing on improving my skills.

Deciding to join PCC’s Music & Sonic Arts program has been one of the most rewarding things I’ve ever done. In just six weeks, I’ve learned more than I thought ever possible!

😭 Now this program is at risk of being cut. There was a school-wide walkout yesterday — one I couldn’t participate in because of autism related challenges — so I decided to speak up here instead.

If you feel able, I’ve shared a link in my Linktree on how to help save this program and keep music alive in our schools.

🎶💋❤️ This weeks marks week 2 of the Music & Sonic Arts program

It’s been hard to adjust to a new routine, but also kind of fun making a new one ☝️

I’m so glad I know how my brain works this time around so I can ask for accommodations if I need them.

I’ve learned that I usually need more time to transition between classes & that it’s ok to ask a lot of questions.

Right now I’m only part time, but it feels like full time for me 😅.

Just got this from and I’m obsessed. Want to live in it every day, for the rest of my dayzzzz…

💯 💯 💯

💕

I love the way you make me laugh -even when I don’t particularly want to. I love the way you capture the hearts, minds, and souls of every person you meet. & I love your adventurous spirit -please don’t ever lose that.

I didn’t plan to make our wedding my personal autism coming-out party, but it’s hard to talk about our relationship without naming the elephant in the room.

Being an undiagnosed autistic meant that we navigated the treacherous waters of frequent misunderstanding & disconnection behind closed doors. It meant that many of our milestones (ones that were supposed to be filled with joy & laughter) were often confusing, or even painful.

With that being said -I want to thank you for a few things.

Thank you for not letting me “slip through the cracks” -not letting me elope, run away, break up with you every time I had a meltdown.

Thank you for being patient with me; even when I got overwhelmed by your (very sweet) surprise proposal at the Thousand Acre Dog Park.

Thank you for sticking with me, not just through the good, but especially through the hard.

Thank you for not giving up on me -on us.

I hope this new chapter is a fresh start. One where we both get the support we need to create new milestones -ones filled with joy & laughter. We both deserve that.

I love you, I trust you, and I’m in this for the long haul.

Till death ☠️

❣️R3llie

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🎵

🚜

Being autistic, it’s almost impossible for me to change my routines—and lately, I’ve been struggling because I’ve had to completely overhaul my skincare.

After years of trial and error, I realized my skin struggles come from having both eczema and a hypermobility disorder. Because my skin is so fragile, most eczema advice just doesn’t work for me.

I can’t use occlusives or oils anymore without clogging my pores and risking infection—even “low comedogenic” products are a no-go.

Today is day 3 of a new, super simple routine—just a gentle Dead Sea Salt soap cleanser followed by a rose water glycerin spray—and my skin already looks less irritated!

Has anyone else had to rethink everything they thought they knew about their skin?

📖 Can’t put this down

Been realizing lately how I have BIG TRAUMA from a multitude of different things.

The biggest one being an undiagnosed Autistic for most of my life

It’s hard (but good) to feel all the feels like sad, mad, angry & scared - everything that I couldn’t let myself feel before.

Learning that it’s ok to spread 🫠 out gift 🎁 giving & receiving through the whole month of December so as not to overwhelm ✌🏼



= just got a new collar 🐶🫶✨💋

🎄

I have a secret 🤫

I 💕

Not only does it help me out with Autism related things (I ask it questions about social stuff all the time)

-but it also helps me out with body stuff (does not replace my in person Drs of course).

So I have had this theory for a while that maybe my psoriasis flares actually have something to do

= I would always get itchy after being “out and about”.

Thought maybe it was because my body was just to stressed out from not having enough support = psoriasis flare 🔥

& turns out there is something to that!

Because I’ve been using my more & voila not as many flares 🔥!

Today’s another couch 🛋️ day.

Haven’t been super active on here lately cause I’ve been trying to figure out what I can and cannot do.

Don’t think I can run 🏃‍♀️ any more for workouts because each time that I run now I end up with a flare 🔥.

I’m not an outdoor biker at all, but I will have to try getting a used indoor cycle bike 🚴 to get the cardio in ~because I really do need it.

Should have probably stopped running a long time ago but my Autistic brain has a REALLY hard time letting go.

This will be my third attempt to quit running.

It’s been a while since I’ve had meltdown after meltdown 3-4 times in a row (the last few days).

It’s probably because of this heat wave 🥵 here in Portland, but also because I’ve been pushing too hard.

Nothing like a few days of melting down to remind you that yes, you are indeed ~Autistic!

(Trying not to get down on myself because I’m still learning)

& Even though I resent this ❤️‍🩹 recovery day; It’s in times like these I also find myself feeling grateful to know about my brain, because before it was so much worse…

Not knowing.

& Even though it’s still hard, now at least I have the right words to describe my experience.

🫶 Being Autistic ♾️ means that most of the time I have a hard time seeing the big picture and today is no exception.

= I totally forgot that it’s only been 5 years since my diagnosis 🤯.

When thinking back to my first moments of identification, realizing myself as Autistic was as easy for me as a bird realizing they can fly, or a stone realizing they can be still.

But the truth of the matter is that being “out and proud” in real life has been waaayyyy harder. + There are still days when I wish I could do more than I can & have trouble accepting my own limitations.

But the good news 🗞️ is : I’m learning more and more that being “out” can be safe around the right people & playing to my strengths (working within those limitations) is how I can finally soar 🦋🦋🦋