Sheva Rajaee, MFT

The ‘Myth of the One’ says the right person will be found based off a feeling- a certainty, a knowing. That the right partner will be a revelation, a lightning bolt of assurance, that you won’t have a single doubt, “you’ll just know it when you feel it.”
This myth says that when you’ll find them, the one, you’ll just know- and if you don’t have that knowing, or didn’t have it at the start of your relationship, it’s not worth pursuing. There just isn’t enough chemistry, you’re wasting your time.
I’m so tired of these “one size fits all” relationship tropes. I’m so tired of the way society and the media tries to make us believe there is one way to feel and one way to be in partnership. That if your love story looks or feels any differently than the Hollywood version, it’s not worthy, and you’re just settling.
No one can decide what a right relationship is for you but YOU. No one gets to decide what amount of love, attraction, compatibility or chemistry is enough to warrant the leap into vulnerability. Don’t listen when someone tries to box your relationship in, reject this basic bs and get curious about what works for you and for your partner.
Allow your love story to be the unique journey it was always meant to be, not the cookie cutter rom com story we’ve come to believe is the only acceptable option.

Happy Sunday. I hate toxic positivity.

A MASSIVE THANK YOU to everyone who has sent DM’s, emails, words of appreciation or written a review since the publishing of Overcoming ROCD 9 months ago. that you would take your time to message me and connect directly means the absolute world, and I’m so glad the book helps you feel less alone. thank you 🙏🏽

Rhyming, unintentional. Message, very intentional ✊🏽

As if we should, anyways 🤍

A freaking HONOR to work, learn from and grow alongside these amazing people.
Thankful every single day for team CAOCD ✌🏽🤍

Some mornings are just anxious mornings 🤷🏻‍♀️

Anytime we decide an emotion, thought, or feeling is bad or unacceptable, we empower it. We send the message to our brains that this experience is threatening, and thus we will feel it more rather than less.
Releasing and allowing when we feel pain, discomfort or any unwanted experience is so very counter to our nature, our instinct is to run and fight! But if you run from your feelings, judge them or try not to experience them, they will have power over you.
Allowing a thought or feeling to exist does not mean we agree with it, it only means that we recognize the futility of resisting that which we cannot control. Your brain will tell you dropping your weapons and accepting discomfort is dangerous, it will tell your this is a slippery slope into complacency- this is a lie.
Allow the pain, allow the thoughts, allow the feelings. Release judgement and watch yourself regain power not because of the absence of discomfort, but because you grew so tolerant you ceased to be bothered by its presence🙏🏽

🙏🏽

It’s not OCD if you like it- the thoughts, the feelings, the compulsions.
*Note* as you recover, you’ll notice your intrusive thoughts don’t bother you as much anymore. Maybe you barely even notice them.
This doesn’t mean you now like the thoughts, agree with their content, or that they are suddenly not OCD anymore.
This just means you’ve stopped responding (yay) so your brain has lowered its alarm signal.