The Radiant Life Project
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Licensed therapist and award winning author here to help you heal trauma and disentangle from unhealthy relationships.
You’re not making it up. You remember things differently than your parent because your brain encoded the memory of those experiences from the developmental position of being a dependent, vulnerable, receptive child while your parent encoded the same experiences from the perspective of a powerful adult in control and from a superior position.
The human brain doesn’t complete development until your late twenties, which means you’re not in your full capacity until then. Until your brain finishes developing, you receive messages from the world and build your blueprint of life & relationships from a less powerful, more vulnerable place.
Meanwhile, your parent operates from a fully developed brain and set of internal resources accrued through their lifetime that put them in a place of greater competency, control, and power. This hugely impacts how they perceive and remember life’s experiences—and why their memories so drastically differ from yours.
From your developing brain’s perspective—
✔️YES it was a big deal
✔️YES it made a major impact
✔️YES you’re right to perceive what you perceive
✔️YES your memories are valid
❤️🙏I hope this helps🙏❤️
📖✨For help navigating your most challenging relationships with family & others, read “Mend or Move On.”
💥💥💥ORDER HERE: https://linktr.ee/theradiantlifeproject
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08/06/2026
New award alert! “Mend or Move On” has just won its 3rd award, this time a gold metal from Living Now Book Awards. This brings my books to a grand total of 7 awards, and my heart is bursting.
It’s perfect timing for you to finally grab that copy you’ve been eyeballing… both books are available in paper, audiobook, and eBook. So stop waiting, start healing. You’ve got this, and I’ve got you.
💥💥Order at my LINK in BIO
in audiobook, eBook, paperback, and hardcover.
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As always, thank you to:
For “Mend or Move On” —
☑️My paper and ebook publisher Hopkins Press
☑️My audiobook publisher: Redwood Audiobooks
☑️My audiobook narrator: Kristin Aikin Salada
For “The Radiant Life Project” —
☑️My paper, audiobook, and eBook publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing
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relationshiphelp
08/06/2026
New award alert! “Mend or Move On” has just won its 3rd award, this time a gold metal from
Living Now Book Awards. This brings my books to a grand total of 7 awards, and my heart is bursting.
It’s perfect timing for you to finally grab that copy you’ve been eyeballing… both books are available in paper, audiobook, and eBook. So stop waiting, start healing. You’ve got this, and I’ve got you.
💥💥Order Here:
https://linktr.ee/theradiantlifeproject
****
As always, thank you to:
For “Mend or Move On” —
☑️My paper and ebook publisher: Johns Hopkins University Press
☑️My audiobook publisher: Redwood Audiobooks
☑️My audiobook narrator: Kristin Salada
For “The Radiant Life Project” —
☑️My paper, audiobook, and eBook publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing UK
****
08/05/2026
The real story is SO layered and complex, it will probably blow your mind. Make no assumptions, just approach the person you know who is no contact with their family with curiosity, compassion, and understanding.
People who chose no contact were met with an unthinkable, last resort, dire decision they likely never wanted to make. They don’t need shame, blame, or judgment. They need support for what was very likely the fight of their life with people who were supposed to love them unconditionally (but wouldn’t, couldn’t, or never did).
✨✨
📖💥 For help with your most challenging relationships, read “Mend or Move On.” Now available in audiobook, too!
💥💥ORDER HERE: https://linktr.ee/theradiantlifeproject
✨✨
Your mom likely had trauma, so did your grandmother. And just like you, what happened to them probably wasn’t their fault - but it was their responsibility to heal it.
So few people in past generations understood this, and that’s why present life is full of people who are finally ready to shift the patterns and heal the deep wounds once and for all.
You’re going to have to be different than those who came before you if you want a different outcome for yourself and your kids. It’s no joke when you’re cycle breaking and shifting patterns of ancestral, intergenerational trauma.
Task number one: stop seeking approval from people who are still stuck in the unhealthy pattern and refuse to change. Focus on the changes you’re making and the world you’re building by doing things differently.
💥📖More teachings for healing and how to navigate this in my books…
💥💥Find my books here: https://linktr.ee/theradiantlifeproject
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08/02/2026
Sometimes music helps with the feels you can’t put into words - especially with painful, complex, confusing experiences like estrangement and no-contact.
Also, now you know my taste in music, and how it varies from LINKIN PARK to Taylor Swift , from Alicia Keys to Jimmie'sChickenShack MisterWives Nikka Costa and more.
I hope this playlist somehow captures the complex emotional experience of going no contact for you the way it has for me. Because it’s not just empowerment, sadness, the loss of hope, rebellion, wounding, healing trauma, relief and optimism…
It’s all that and more, bundled into one heart wrenching experience I’d never wish on anyone… and yet still, it’s a reality so many of us do face. And we have to make unthinkable choices to protect ourselves, our partners, and children from those who harm us.
I hope this playlist helps and supports you.
ALSO: comment below - what songs would you add??
💥📖 Read “Mend or Move On” for help navigating (and breaking free from) your most challenging relationships.
NOW IN AUDIOBOOK !!!!
💥💥💥Order all formats here:
https://linktr.ee/theradiantlifeproject
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Nobody likes being rejected, but some are more sensitive to it than others. These are usually those who experienced early rejection from their caregivers, or those who have been brutally rejected in toxic, dysfunctional relationships.
The piece that’s not often discussed is that rejection sensitivity doesn’t only affect the one being rejected. Sometimes it’s also a deeply engrained pattern for a person to be overly sensitive to not making others feel rejected. Kind of like sensitivity to causing rejection sensitivity.
This is where people develop patterns like people pleasing or over-functioning in relationships, where they self-abandon or do not speak their needs out of fear of making their counterpart feel rejected or hurting their feelings.
In the long run, this typically cause heightened hurt feelings because when the dynamic becomes intolerable (which it usually does), the person who may feel rejected also feels lied to for the duration of the relationship, often not understanding how deeply engrained the pattern is in their counterpart to avoid hurting feelings.
It’s complex, my friends. So layered and nuanced.
Keep going, keep doing the work, keep healing.
💥💥💥Read “Mend or Move On” for help navigating your toughest relationships. Now available in audiobook! Find all formats at my LINK in BIO.
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07/29/2026
I was recently interviewed for a WSJ article I wasn’t a good fit for that aimed to demonize therapists as the cause for a “dangerous estrangement trend.”
I wasn’t a good fit because I do not believe the journalist’s claims. I was saddened by her adherence to her perspective without openness to my professional opinions that contradicted her outlook:
☑️ It’s not a trend.
People have distanced themselves for all of time. Today’s world talks about it more and normalized inner work & trauma healing, so there is more comfort and safety than prior generations to address painful topics like abusive family.
☑️People are not recklessly, impulsively cutting off family.
The vast majority of those who choose no contact have experienced years and decades of damaging conflict & abuse from their family and simply cannot take anymore.
☑️The therapy room is not a place where an adult child brutally cuts off a parent without that parent having a say.
More likely it’s a place where the parent was invited to join and participate in healing, but they refused the invitation.
☑️I do not encourage estrangement, I support my clients who have lived long, painful experiences with dysfunctional, abusive, unsafe family members.
I am not looking the other way, shuffling their pain under the rug, or encouraging them to tolerate continuing maltreatment.
☑️Trauma and abuse definitions have deepened, broadened, and become more nuanced than in past generations.
We now address emotional, psychological, spiritual, and sexual abuse as valid and wrong.
☑️I only speak for myself as a therapist in this post, however I am connected to a community of excellent practitioners. I am not aware of any therapists who actively encourage estrangement. Most support their client’s drive toward safety, health, mental wellness, and trauma healing. If that involves distancing from family, most therapists meet their clients in that place and go from there.
💥📖Read “Mend or Move On” for extra support and guidance on this complex topic. Now available in audiobook!
💥💥💥ORDER HERE: https://linktr.ee/theradiantlifeproject
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Hatred is optional in no-contact situations, and often it’s not present at all.
When someone walks away from a relationship, it doesn’t mean they hate the other person, it means they are done with the dynamic.
By cutting ties, they likely choose health, freedom, or a positive flow rather than the dysfunctional or misaligned dynamic that has evolved in the relationship.
Most of the time when people walk away from a relationship, hatred isn’t present. In best case scenarios, people can part ways and wish each other well, but in dysfunctional relationships, the ending becomes volatile because there is a lack of maturity or emotional Intelligence present to acknowledge that the relationship is hindering the health and well-being of all involved.
So no, people who go no-contact are not typically full of hatred. They’re just moving toward their chosen life rather remaining in a relationship that no longer feels aligned or healthy.
📕NEW BOOK ALERT: my new book, “mend or move on,” is on this exact topic. If you’re navigating the choice point between whether to stay or go, I’ve got you. Now available in audio, too!
💥💥💥ORDER TODAY: https://linktr.ee/theradiantlifeproject
07/27/2026
Audio book lovers, you’ll LOVE listening to this absolutely life changing, paradigm shifting relationship book in audio.
Narrated by the lovely Kristin Aikin Salada you will be guided and supported through the complex navigation process of discerning whether your most challenging, unhealthy relationships can be repaired or must be left behind.
With the skillful, thoughtful approach of my 20-year background as a licensed therapist, this deep-dive relationship guide will support your highest alignment and freedom in the connections of your life. Whether you ultimately choose to “Mend” or “Move On” from your most challenging relationships, you will do so with the courage, empowerment, and strength this book instills. You will reclaim your authority over your life, and harness the integrity to cultivate relationships that truly nourish and support you. And yes, you deserve that.
With all the love in my heart, this book will compassionately and skillfully answer your “What should I do” and “How do I deal with this” questions about toxic family, unhealthy partnerships, dysfunctional friendships, and mis-aligned connections of all kinds. You are far from alone.
🎧📖 — DOWNLOAD TODAY here:
https://linktr.ee/theradiantlifeproject
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