Christopher lubey

I am not well…
It’s hard to admit that

Every day I struggle and my thoughts and anxiety flood my brain. This week was the extremely tough and I have no idea why. I’m starting to really think about “What is the point of living if I’m not really living” — I wake up every day, go to work, and then go to bed. I struggle to get a good nights of rest due to my extreme anxiety and thoughts flooding my brain. I officially broke down today and I knew it would happen at some point this week. If you know me I seem normal in the outside, but in the inside I’m struggling and struggling the most I ever had before. I’m starting to break down and kind of showing my struggles. My mood has went from faking happiness to being way less enthusiastic and have no emotion when talking to people. I’m also not hearing what other people are saying because my voices in my head can’t stop talking. Every day this week I woke up with extreme anxiety and couldn’t stop until the time I went to bed.

17 weeks ago I had surgery for my hip to repair a torn labrum. Right know I am thankful to be walking because it shows me I am not where I was yesterday or a day before that. Im progressing and getting better. Walking had brought some joy and peace back into my life and know I’m thinking on my final path to start running again soon. It’s been the toughest 2 years of my life and I just want to thank God for getting me through this. First I need to build a foundation then I need to build some strength before I start running.

for If you split up your goals into small little accomplishments, you will feel like your progressing. Small steps lead to bigger success. You might be stressed out looking at your dream, but if you accomplish smaller goals your on your way to success.

One issue 80% healed another 100% painful…
As most of y’all know, I had hip surgery on August 3, 2022. This surgery was to fix a hip impingement and a torn labrum. There was a 5 mm difference on the hip that was cutting into the labrum. Yeah it’s now been 93 days since surgery and it amazes me how the body can recover but during this time I start to notice right hip pain. I have felt it before I had surgery, but did not think too much of it, but as time went on this pain on the right side just got worse and worse I am now starting to fear a bilateral hip impingement as the pain I have are identical to each other. No matter what I do walk, sit, eat, strengthen the hip the pain just seems to get worse and worse. I truly have no words to describe the anger and sadness I am feeling in this moment.

Final varsity race if the day

3rd varsity race from today

2nd varsity race today

1st varsity race at districts

I had just submitted my application to attend Appalachian Sate University in hopes of finding a new direction in my life. I am a person who loves to be different and sometimes step out of my comfort zone and with this would be perusing those 2 actions.

Leaving home will be tough but that is what life is about. Is changing your path and leading yourself into a different direction.

College has always but a hit or miss in my head. I said I don’t want to go for a long time and did want to go, and I continued to switch my opinion on college for a long time. I agree college isn’t for everyone. But sometimes your passion and joys need a college degree. I want to go into college with an open mind and learn more about nutrition and the way our body works. I will be in hopes of graduating Appalachian state with a BS in kinesiology majoring in Exercise Science.

When me and my twin visited the blue ridge mountains a few years ago we made countless memories. I plan to go to North Carolina and make a difference in my life, help make a difference in other peoples’s life’s, and make more memories.

EBR Metro

EBR Metro

The greatest sibling trio of all time

When I go off to college next year (hopefully out of state - Colorado, Florida, North Carolina) I will miss my family. Today was the first time experiencing college life and couldn’t be happier to do it with my sister and twin.

Thank you sarah for showing me around, kinda makes me want to stay here

SNL XC Invitational Boys Varsity