Will Writes

The Naija spirit

Once Nigerians dey your case eh, just forget it.

See how they jumped on this guy's case and the government has taken over. Let's just pray he gets justice.

Mohbad wasn't really popular when he was alive, look at how he has become popular after his death.

Anytime I open my phone, the first notification I see concerns Mohbad.

Perhaps this is how he would have been popular if he had not joined a wicked record label.

I did not really know the guy too well sha.

So me and my friends were known as terrorist in school. This was because any club in school that went for excursion we would follow.

Most of our classmates have tried following us but they were caught.

So this time,it was the red cross society that were going on an excursion. Me and my friends prepared for the trip. We did not even ask where they were going,we just entered the bus.

I was happy because it was another successful trick.

We kept going until we left the road and followed a bushy path. We finally stopped at an old building. The environment was odd.

Then the coordinator addressed us before we proceeded to the building. When we got to the door,our coordinator knocked and after few seconds,the door opened.

An old man came out and welcomed us. He took us in.

Immediately we entered,everywhere became cold. Our coordinator was discussing with the old man when we heard siren. Then something was brought in wrapped with a white clothe.

I thought it was charcoal until the white clothe was removed and I saw a dead body. That was when it dawn on me that we were in the mortuary. Our coordinator told us to all put on our nose mask and hand glove. Luckily for me,I was with my nose mask.

Then he told us that we were going to carry out the experiment discussed in class. By now I had noticed that me and my friends were not the only strangers,many people had found their way into the bus.

The first person went and came back and said what he observed. Everyone followed Until it reached one boy's turn. He got there and opened the fridge where dead bodies were kept and immediately a hand from inside gripped him.

Come and see run. Our coordinator was no where to be found. We went to where the bus was parked but it wasn't there. The boy was still screaming. Everyone stood looking confused.

Just then we saw the old man running,he came and told us a mad ghost just escape. Journey that took us two hours to get here using bus, I used my leg and got home in five minutes.

So today,me and my girlfriend decided to go for jogging very early in the morning. We wanted to enjoy the harmattan breeze. We wore our work out clothes and got ready.

We hit the road jogging,telling each other jokes,gisting and laughing. It was such a lovely moment. Anyone we passed had to turn and look at us a second time.we were perfect together.

We were almost close to where we will stop when we saw one guy jogging with a dog that looked more like a lion. It was held with about three chains. The guy greeted us and passed.

Immediately this dog saw me,it did as if it knew me and started struggling to break free from the chains. The guy was trying to calm the dog but it was still struggling.

By this time,my girlfriend had ran to hide at my back. She was telling me to do something. The way I looked at her ehn. The dog was now very fierce,it was trying to attack the owner.

The guy had no choice but to release it because he also needed to save his life. Immediately the dog was released,I did not care to find my girlfriend. The way I ran,cars were even struggling to keep pace with me.

I got home and immediately remembered that I had left my girlfriend behind. I entered inside to rest before going to look for her. When I entered,I saw my girlfriend packing her loads.
She said I couldn't even protect her from a little dog.

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My uncle was a military under the Nigerian army who were being sent to sambisa forest to fight the dreaded boko Haram.

My uncle was nicknamed 'Dibia' by his colleagues. The reason was because the enemy's bullets always had little effect on him.

This made his colleagues think that he had gone fortification somewhere. My uncle always told them that he was a strong catholic and will not doubt his faith by going to a medicine man.

The enemies attacked again and they were forced to go into the sambisa forest. Before my uncle left, he bought a packet of bullet energy drink and drank half.

He left the remaining for me and departed. After three days of his departure,it was reported that the terrorist group were defeating the soldiers.

I set out for the forest immediately. I went with a packet of bullet energy drink and was lucky to see a villager who took me to where the soldiers were.

I saw my uncle and his colleagues all looking tired.
My uncle was shocked to see me, I gave him the energy drink and he drank together with his colleagues.

Before I knew what was happening, they had carried their guns to look for their enemy. Out of fear, I looked for a tree and climbed with a can of bullet energy drink in my hand.

Have you ever thought of running from home to a different location?

That was the thought that crept into my mind after just receiving ten lashes of cane from my dad for coming home late.

I decided that I would leave the house that night when everyone had gone to sleep.

I started packing my clothes into my small bag.

I had no location in mind, I just wanted to run to a place where I will be free to play all day.

I never thought of what I will be eating.

So after packing my clothes, I was now ready to leave, but I was hungry and I had no money to buy anything.

I went to the kitchen to eat for the last time.

I started opening the pot to see what had been cooked.

I opened the first pot and saw beans with plantain, I refused to be tempted.

I opened the second pot to see stew and plenty meat.

I scooped beans with plantain, mixed the Stew and started eating.

While I ate, I thought of all the things I will be missing, the free food, friends and family.

After eating the last meat in the food, I went to sleep.

That was how I dreamt that the government were taking street children to the refugee camp. In that dream, I was wondering on the street with my bag when they caught me.

I woke up and ran to my father to ask for forgiveness.

While we were preparing for Christmas last year, my dad bought a bull which were going to use to celebrate Christmas.

The day before Christmas, my dad had told me and brother to slaughter the bull against the next day.

And so we tied the bull on its neck and leg and started pulling the rope to make the bull fall. At first the bull complied and went down.

I quickly ran to hold the neck, only for the bull to cut the rope and stand up. When I saw this, I stopped and turned to look at my brother but he was already gone.

Without being told,I ran and the bull ran after me. I threw everything I was holding and started shouting for help.

I was almost giving up running when I saw my brother coming out with two cans of red bull energy drink.

He threw them at the bull. The bull stopped to look at the can on the floor. The bull tried opening it but could not.

While it was still struggling with the can on the floor, my brother took the bull down and we were able to kill it.

I rushed to where the red bull energy drink was, picked it and drank.

Back then in secondary school, precisely, my senior secondary one and two, I was a friend to one of the finest girl in school then.

Because of our closeness, many people thought we were dating.

What brought about this suspicion?

When I came to the school newly, I was told that she was a girl of high principle. She never really played with boys and so on.

She was also popular in the school.

For someone to be intelligent and beautiful with all the feminine qualities in the right places, all attention was on her.

I was not the type that could talk, especially with the opposite gender and so I decided to be on my own.

One day, after our teacher had marked our assignment on narrative essay, one of my guys came to tell me that Deborah was looking for me.

I had to ask which of the Deborah and he told me that it was the popular Deborah.

I thought I had done something wrong because as at then, we were not on talking terms and I saw no reason why she would be looking for me.

I decided to go and meet her since since I was convinced that I had done nothing wrong.

I got to class and saw her holding my English language note and I approached her.

She said she was impressed by my essay and told me that I could publish books in the future.

That was it.

We got along so well and fast that it raised eyebrows.

I actually asked her out but she was like

"I want to face my studies and don't want any distraction".

So we remained friends. During the time of our friendship, I never knew I had brought attention to myself.

Wherever I went, people would tease me.

My friends, my classmates and even my juniors.

This often made her uncomfortable and she was always scared, of what ? I never knew.

We remained friends until something happened and our friendship ended. I wouldn't want to talk about it.

The thing is, this episode of my life in school always amaze me whenever I remember it.

The premier league was the most entertaining league in the world and so me and my friend Chizzy never missed a match.

I was an arsenal fan while my friend preferred man city.

I noticed that anytime we were about to watch any premier league match that featured man city, my friend would go to the bathroom and bathe for an hour.

When I ask him why he does so,he would just shrug it off and say it's nothing. And anytime he bathes before any match, his team would surely win.

So the day arsenal and man city were to play against each other, my friend went to bath as usual. When I saw him,I knew that man city will win if I didn't do something.

I decided to go and see if he normally bathes. I peeped and Saw him bathing with three soaps. I went back and sat down waiting for him.

Immediately he came out,I ran to bathe. I saw that he had just used three premier soaps. I used six premier soaps and made sure they were all finished.

The match ended in a draw that day.

Anytime there was sunlight,we were always happy. We would run around the neighborhood shouting and playing until we get ourselves soaked in dirt.

Then we would always go home with a frown because we know mother would scolds us and threaten to tell father.

One day,we left home for school leaving enough sunlight at home. When we got to school,we had a playing spree.

We tried not to get our uniforms to be dirty but all our attempts to keep our uniform clean were futile. Then something happened as we were playing.

The sunlight suddenly disappeared and the clouds started to gather. We paused our play, looked up and frown. Then the rain came and we all ran back to our classes.

That day, when the school closed,we went home with tears in our eyes because we knew that mother would finally report us to father.

When we got home, mother wasn't back from work. We all ran to the store and took our sunlight detergent, poured it in a bucket with water and dipped our uniforms in it.

Although there was no sunlight in the sky, we had our sunlight detergent at home.

After posting a story, I see comments like

"Your story no get head"

"You be mumu"

Normally, these comments were supposed to discourage me or get me angry but no, they actually encourage me.Knowing fully well what it took me to come up with something like that only for someone to come and start saying trash.

It's never easy to put ideas into writing, most times you feel you are writing nonsense and then stop.

It's your data, it's your time and so you can say whatever you like.

I'm G-willz

There's this monster that has been disturbing the peace of our village. It came out mostly at night and very early in the morning.

This made the king to order that every activity in the village should end by evening. Nobody could tell where the monster had come from. It was really big with ugly popping eyes.

Market women could not longer go to their stalls early, the men couldn't stay long in their farms and hunters could not shoot their guns because of fear.

The king promised to give half of his kingdom to anyone who could kill the monster or pursue it out of the village. I went to the king and and told him I could do it.

I also told him that all I wanted for my reward was his beautiful princess. He gave me his blessings and wished me well.

I set to work immediately, bought a pack of monster energy drink and drank some. When it was evening, I took the remaining and went in search of the monster.

After several minutes of fruitless search, it showed up. I threw a can of the monster energy drink I was holding and using its claws, the monster ripped it open and drank as it could.

Then I showed him the one in my hand and beckoned on it to come take. With an angry howl,it came after me.

I ran and lured it straight to the river, the monster jumped, ready to tear me into shreds but I had already dived to the side. It landed inside the river and drowned.

I ran home to drink the remaining cans of monster energy drink.