Chidi Nebo Book Collection- CNBC

Penman, adman, humorist, satirist

12/02/2026

Your gut has been screaming for months.
But you keep telling yourself “I’m just insecure,” “It’s just a phase,” “Only bad marriages have affairs.”
Wrong.
The #1 lie cheaters count on is you doubting your own intuition.
Stop gaslighting yourself.
To Catch a Cheat shows you exactly which signs are real—and which ones you can no longer ignore.
Link in comments.

29/07/2024

I saw a woman shouting into an envelope and she told me she was trying to send a voicemail.

19/04/2024

THIS LANGUAGE CALLED ENGLISH

Everyday, I come across words, phrases and sentences that are wrongly used. The eclectic nature of the English language hardly makes it any easier. Nor do English wordsmiths who could have made the language as simple as possible. Otherwise, many a grammatical faux pas (sorry, they borrowed it from the French) would not find excuse in the language not being our mother-tongue.

The truth remains: the inhabitants of that tiny isle we call Britain had limited vocabulary. I can almost feel their frustration with having to use one word to describe several things. And rather than bemoan their luck, they set out in droves, conquering and colonizing foreign climes and imposing their language on them- but not without first stealing as many of their words and expressions as possible. The result of British dominance can be seen today in the sheer richness and, if we care, often confusing syntaxes of that language called English.

English wordsmiths have however overreached themselves. Several words in their superfluity add to our confusion. Ther is no sens in filling words with leters that ar not functional. If, for instance, we culd dispens with extra leters in words, English gramar and spelings wud becom easier and simpl. In the same vein, ampl oportunities wud be created in busines. Think of how convenient comunication would becom.

Again, if they made some words spel as they sound, komunikashon wud certainly be easier and so wud the konstrukshon of sentensis. And insted of loking up difikult words in the dikshonary, we kud save valuabl time.

If the wordsmiths were magnanimous, they wud hav konsidered sticking to one plural form for every word. Students in universitys wud no dout welkom such an adishon to their kurikulums. Then ther wud be no konfushon betwen thiefs, chieves and knifes. Inded, words with diferent strukchers wud no longer be under diferent canopys.

In some instances, similar sounding words spel diferent while those with similar spelings sound diferent. You wuld think ‘though’, ‘thought’, ‘tough’ were in the same family until you tried pronouncing them. As if that was not enough, they started imitating the French with regards to writing words differently from how they are pronounced and vice versa. Why on God’s earth can’t I pronounce the word ‘victual’ as it is written? Of course, it isn’t ‘vik-chual’! Then I consider in utter bewilderment the difference in pronunciation between such a family of words like ‘tyranny’ ‘tyrannize’ and ‘tyrant’. How about the word that represents a female pig and that act of planting seed- sow? Just an inflection and we have a whole new meaning.

And while we’re at it, som words ar given certain strange klasifikashons. ‘Kayak’, for instance atains a form known as palindrome simply becaus it spels the same backward. Who cares what a palindrome is, anyway?

The English wordsmiths wuld not hear of this. That’s why you hear that spech has ‘figures’ and ‘parts’. So, while peopl wear skirts, towns have outskirts. Not stoping ther, diferent kolors ar used to deskribe our moods: blue when sad; green when envious and when someone is afraid, we say he’s white with fear, and so on.
Who knows what next? One day, perhaps, words wud speak for themselves.

Copyright Nebo 2024

14/03/2024

The Anatomy of a Slap

It was from a soldier’s slap that I understood the real meaning of the saying that ‘all fingers are not equal.’ It actually means that all hands are not equal, not so much in the sense of how unequal individuals may be with regards to wealth, as it is in how much strength there is in an individual’s hand. For instance, I used to think that bricklayers had the deadliest slapping power given the nature of their work. Nay I was wrong. That honour goes to the soldier, any soldier, tired or retired. When a soldier’s hand meets your face, it is a life-changing experience. It is not like anyone else’s slap.
For a better understanding.

To continue the story, see the link in the comment.