Master Mike

We were on our own, minding our business,when suddenly,our new teacher walked inside the classroom.

We greeted her just like good students that we were,and then she asked us to sit down.

"Students,my name is Latisha,
and I want you all to cooperate with me.

If you all do as I say,I will not fl any of you.

We will be friends and everyone will be happy okay?"

"Yes,auntie."We all replied.

"I think I like this auntie."Pecky said with a smile on her face.

"Yes,I like her perfume more."FokuFokuFo added.

Meanwhile,Tanker was not in school during this time.

Infact,that boy was still in bed playing video game when I called him on phone.

"Hey,where are you?
The new teacher is in class."I said to him on phone.

"What?
I thought today is Saturday,
Una don change am?"He asked.

"Tanker,no just make me vess."I said to him angrily.

"Your twin brother is here,and you are saying you think today is Saturday."

"I was thinking today is Saturday,so
I had to sleep on top of the mango tree just to observe things.

I didn't sleep in the house last night.

Ooooooohhhhhhhhhm."He sighed.

"Please start coming now,you can't miss this class.

And,I am missing you too."I said shyly before ending the call.

"Hello students!"

"Hello auntie!"We replied.

"You have to repeat everything I say to you,is that und..."

Before the teacher could finish what she was saying,she was interrupted by Tanker's entrance.

And as soon as he stepped inside the classroom,we all stood up.

"Goooooooooooooooooooooooooood
Morrrrrrrniiiiiingggg, Principal!"We loudly greeted.

"Thank you my guys,sit down all of you!"Tanker replied and the teacher stood there in shock.

"Like what just happened right now?"She asked,still looking so flabbergasted.

"Who is this boy?
And why did the whole class have to greet him?
And why is he even coming to school by this time?"The teacher asked.

The whole class was calm and attentive.

We were just staring at the teacher,not saying a word.

"Okay,I will report this to the

😂 PLEASE READ TO THE END 😂

Sunday: Marry me 😊

Girl: Do you have a flat? 🏡

Sunday: No 😔

Girl: Do you have a Camry car? 🚗

Sunday: No 😔

Girl: What’s your salary? 💵

Sunday: I don’t have a salary but I—

Girl: No but what?! You have nothing!
How can I marry you? Please leave before I open my eyes. 😤

Sunday: But wait…

I have one estate,
3 landed properties in GRA,
3 Ferraris,
2 Porsches,
and 2 G-Wagons. 😏

Why should I buy a Camry? 🤷‍♂️

And how can I earn a salary when I am the boss?

Girl: 😳😳

That’s why I told you to leave…

Because I’m coming to your house to propose to you myself. ❤️😂

👇👇👇 DON’T STOP READING 👇👇👇

God: Today I’m missing my children. 😢

Satan: Which children? 😈

God: The one reading this post. 👇

Satan: They will never miss you.

God: They miss me too.

Satan: They don’t love you.

God: Are you sure?

Satan: Yes, they love me more. 😈

God: Let’s see…

Satan: Mine will scroll past without reacting.

God: Mine will like and comment AMEN. 🙏

Let’s disappoint Satan today. 😇

Dr0p AMEN 🙏 in the c0mments if you love God.

And follow for more jokes and stories daily.

1.) My sister, please if you don't Know how to Cook, just Agree And stop Cõnfusing the Public...😒😒😒

Which again is: "I might not be good in Cooking, but I can Fry Rice ' 💥💥😒😒😂😂😂

2). I mistakenly opened TikTok and closed it immediately.

I got a text from MTN ,"Dear customer, it's like you You're already feeling Próud with the 50mb you Just bought" 😒😭😭😭😂😂😂

3) If you are broke and your wife is paying All the bills. My brother it's your duty to screām during sëx. You can't be usëléss day and night 😳😒😂😂😂

4) . Last Night i dreamt Eating Noddles... Now I can’t find My Oraimo cord 😔😔😂😂😂

6. My Landlord has been Disturbing me for House Rent, he doesn't know I am the Girl he is dating on Social Media.

I don't feel like giving him the 10k he sents me last week 😳😳😋😋🙄😂😂😂😂

7. In the book of Facebook, chapter 4:2, Mark says ("Many Are Online but Few can See pictures" and their Brand Color is purple). 🙄😂😂😂😂😂

8. Imagine toasting a Girl in a wedding ceremony and your mom just walk in and say put this food in a black plastic, it's our night food 😳😳😔😭😭😂😂😂

9) Those who are doing agriculture in University, please tell me why chickens run before having sēx😒😒😂😂😂

My Dearie 😔😔; If nobody cares to talk to you, Just know that you have Me ,☝️😧😧😔😔😭

ÀFRICANS ARE VERY FUNNY 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
0.When you see twin sisters, just know the short one is always the oldest🤣🤣

1. Going to your boyfriends house without informing him that heartbrēak you are looking for, sister, you shall find it.😂😂

2. "Bring your CV let me see what I can do about it".
This statement has imprēgnated many ladies in Africa🤣😂

3. The number of abørtion Pills in some of girls stomach can open a Pharmacy 😩💔😂

4. I have done so many mīstakes in my life 😢But I have never left a wedding ceremony without eating,, Nēver 😂

5. After accepting your friend request, you are still asking me can we be friends?
Noooo come and be my landlord 😂🚴

6. If you still look at the toilet paper after wiping urself, you have a prøblem of letting go of the past🚴😂

7. Camera quality will make u think that girl ain’t your level

But behind the quality is quality hūnger😂😂

8. DO NOT dress like the body u want. Dress like the body u have. U can't dress like Beyonce if u are shaped like Rick Ross!🤣🤣

9. *If you see a group of four girls and you want to talk to one, first greet the ūgly one.*
She is the Commander in Chief.😂

10. Sleeping close to bae for the first time is too hārd, you have to breath in english not too fast, not too loud and not too slow just to avøid embarrāssment😂

11. "When visiting a sīck person"

Americans: Get well soon dear

British: Speedy recovery niggga

Nigerians: chai!, Na this kin sickness kīīll blessing o😂

12. I hātē it when I'm praying and my mind take me to some nasty stuffs, I'm like no no God. Please I'm starting again🤣🤣

13. Photosynthesis is anything that has weight and occupy space🤣😂thank God I still remember that one🚴😂.

14. You are trying to go without reacting 🙄 heaven is far from you 😏🤦‍♂️

Please add or follow me for more interesting jokes 🙏🏻👉🏻

I can never date a fat girl again
This girl didn’t only break my heart,she also broke my bed😭💔🤦🏼‍♂️🤔🙆

1. Pet d0g 100K 😀😁😰 wetin do my shørt friend😂

2. Cynthia can I be the butter in your bread🍞 abi u don use beans😎

3. As garri don cøst now, make Una give me soup make I use swãlløw my pr!de 😡

4. You fit dey fast, make your babe serve you breãkf@st 😅

5. Shey make we still dey f£år ur return😩 abi make we contribute mønêy make u return😑

6. As a girl 👧 why your y@nsh go strôñg 😦 u be tort0ise 😮

7. Them say if u no work, you no go chop😸. But how I won take work when I never chop😊

8. Na u say make I fēel at home 🏡. I tell ur papa make him bring me water u cm dey v*x😯😕

9. If no be say u be th!ëf, why u go dey crãve wetin u no fit afford🙀🙈

10. E get who go dey crūsh on u 💑 u go just dey v*x😅

11. Cynthia you said I'm not concerned about you😃😄. Wetin concern me sef no concern me, talk lêss of wetin no concern me😰

12. Super pack indomie 20K😧 this súffër don dey pass the one wey Adam and eve caūs£ oo😩

13. You dey v*x say I leak the s£çrët wey u tell me😒. If s£çrët easy to keep, why u tell me😬

14. I dey wait make iPhone 20 commot. I no won buy underage phone📱

15. Back in secondary school, nothing gives me joy😏 than cleaning the board when others are still writing 😅

16. Some people dey take r!sk sha, how u go build mountain of f!rë church beside gas station 😈

17. From January to November u go dey cōmplāin of vill@ge people🙅 but by December reach u pat transport go meet them😰😳

Nigerians are very good in interpretation of things 😮🙆🙆🤣
NAIRA - Never Allow Idíot Rule Again ✍️

PHCN - Prøblem Has Changed Name✍️

APC - Association of Past Crïminãls✍️

NYSC - Now Your Strūggles Continue✍️

PDP - People Decëiving People.✍️

MTN- Maintain Total Nøñsense ✍️

ABACHA - After Babangida Another Crimiñál Has Arrived✍️

NEPA- Never Expect Power Again ✍️

BUHARI - Brought Uñnēçessary Hãrdshïp Among Reasonable Individuals.✍️

LAGOS=love all girls on Sunday

KOBO= k!ll ojukwu before order

NEPA = Never expect power always

IBADAN= Igbo boys are dangerøus at night

Don't laugh alone.......Let others laugh with you.
NIGERIA IS SECOND TO NONE.

Na only for Naija e de happen o.....

Na only for Naija you
go see fish inside
"MEAT PIE"..🤣🤣😂

Na only for Naija we
dey count money after
we withdraw am from
ATM because we no
even trust ATM
machines.😂😂😂😂😂

Na only for Naija
PHCN dey say:-Win a
brand new GENERATOR
if you pay your NEPA
bill...😂😂😂😂😂

Na only for Naija
people dey horn for
trâffic light make e
quick change from Red
to Green...😂😂😂😂

Na only for Naija
Phārmacy dey sell Coke, Recharge Card, Chin chin, Puff puff and beer.😂😂😂😂😂

Wetin you no see for
Naija, you no fit see am
anywhere in d world...😂😂😂😂😂

Na only for naija you go see one person dey use iPhone 13, iPhone X, Tecno camon 16and itel 24 ultra all at once while his mother dey sell groundnut
for Junction. 😂🤣🤣😂😂😂😂

Na only for Naija, you go see mād man dey
control trâffic, people
wey get señsë dey obey.

Na only for Naija, you go see nâtive doçtor dey use laptop connected with MTN modem. Maybe they are now consulting the spirïts online..😂😂😂😂🤣

Na only for naija u go
see a man selling a book from street to street that says HOW TO MAKE MONEY WITHOUT STRÉSS. I wonder why him no read d book. Lol 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

I salute Nigerians......
I am proud of my country ✅💯😄🤣

0001. Pesin wey dey answer PROSPER no dey go forward

0002. Hunger wan k!ll BLESSING

0003. EXCELLENT no know book

0004. LUCKY no get helper

0005. FAVOUR dey bég for urgent 2k

0006. Village people dey f0ll0w FREEDOM from back

0007. ESTHER dey do ash@wo

0008. DAVID wife dey bëåt am for house

0009. PEACE no fit dey sleep because of condítion

0010. REJOICE no get Joy

0011. Nah only courage nai still gather mind go f?ck pesin wife yesterday 😭😭😭😭🥹🤣😂😂😂😂

DM me Whatsāpp= 90684∅8596= Scām 😂😂

0012. Send me your CV= Scām 😂😂

0013. I will get back to you= Scām 😂

0014. I wish I met you before my wife= Scām 😂

0015. I was on a call= Scām 😂 😂

0016. Your vote counts= Scām 😂 😂

🙆😆😂🤣 FUNNY JOKES 🤣😂😲✌️😋

1.So this fine girl 🧛 for my street no show face all day when I wear fine clothes 🤵…
Na when I wan go buy bread 🍞 she appear like ev!l spìr!t 🤣🤣😂

2. This Nigerian movie wey I dey watch now ehn…
One girl 🧛 go meet babalawo make her ex 👦 run m@d,
only to find out say the nat!ve doctor na the boy papa 👴😲
Abeg make I no spo!l am…
I go tell una for next episode 🚶🚶🚶

3. Any lady wey dey close her eyes during s no be shyness o…
Na gu!lt—too many faces dey flash 🤣🤣🤣

5.We no even hear prec!ous side of the story…
We just agree say she disappo!nt 2Face 😂😂

6.. Happiness na when you dey eat akara, think say e don finish…
You touch the nylon, discover say one still dey inside 😚😚😚

7. If you no wan send her money 💰, tell her straight 🙄
Which one be: “I tried your account number but it was switched off”?
Guys 🤵 too get sense abeg 🤣🤣🤣

8.Being single for too long no good o…
I don even forget how to spell relassionsheep 🙆😅😅

10. If I no make you laugh 🙄, I understand—you fa!il JAMB.
If you laugh but no react, I understand—you peep am from person phone.
If you laugh but no comment, I understand—you no wan emb@arrass yourself with spelling.
But one thing wey I understand for sure be say…
👉 You go follow my page 🤣🤣

1. 😂Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming.
I gave him a small glass of water 🏃😂

2. 😂I don finally hear Goliath side of story, he say dem never shout 'W@R START' David Rush thr0w st0ne 🙆😂

3. 😂I have been looking for a place to f@int, when I heard a girl telling a guy that she fell down from her bed and broke her virgin!ty 😂😂

4. 😂If you sl@p me on the right check, I will turn the left one for you to slap too 🤗... Then we'll sit down as adults and discuss how you want your fun£r@l to be 😒🏃🏃

5. 😂 People will bath with a bucket and be like: ''I just showered'' my friend you just BUCK£TED. Be specific 😏😂😂

6. 😂 Nowadays, it's very h@rd to see food in the dream

If you're lucky to see fufu, you won't see soup😌

7. 😂 Nothing will ever make me go to Ch!na restaurant again, one day in Beijing, I was very hūñgryy I went to a nearby restaurant and a waiter brought their menu., I saw
1 boiled frøgs 🙆🏿‍♂️🙆🏿‍♂️🙆🏿‍♂️
2 baked liz@rd lūngs🙆🏿‍♂️🙆🏿‍♂️🙆🏿‍♂️
3 fried c0ckroach🙆🏿‍♂️🙆🏿‍♂️🙆🏿‍♂️ int£stines
4 porridge mosqū!to spines🙆🏿‍♂️🙆🏿‍♂️🙆🏿‍♂️
5 rosted sn@kes liver🙆🏿‍♂️🙆🏿‍♂️🙆🏿‍♂️
Etc,,,, and I was like come ooo did I tell you that I'm hūñgryy😡

8. 😂Sometimes silent is not the best answer for a fool.
Target the teeth... Bre@k like 6, then wait and see who will be sil£nt 😒😂😂

9. 😂 I don learn another romantic words today... Baby ch£w me like a grass, because you're the only ewu 🐐 Hausa in my heart 😂😂😂

10. 😂 I can't forget the day a Y@hoo boy told me that the full meaning of SC@M is -->
S= Success
C= Comes
A= As
M= Miracle
🙆🏻‍♂️🙆🏻‍♂️😂😂

11. 😂 I don't know why people with dimples always think they have a degree in smiling.. let me smile for you 😁
😁😁

12. 😂 Ordinary go and off light, you are jumping and jubilating. What if she turns to sn@ke?

Chaiiii, temple rūñ reloaded
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

1. When a girl clap before dancing just know she wants to dance nonsense 😅 😭 🤣 🤓

2. Another day to remind you that your babe is grabbing micro phone but not in the church 🤣 🤣 🤣 😁 😁 🤣 😁 😁 😁 😁 🤣 😭

3.When a guy is touching you, that unknown feeling that runs all over your body, my sister nah your sense the go like that, oyyaa tell him to leave you.😭😭😭😭😭😭😭🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

4.If you know you threw your tooth🦷 on top of the roof for another one to grow🥲😩😩, gather here let’s laugh at ourselves 🥹😭🤭😂😂😂😂

5 . She fell in love with an electricians, nah like that he go dey shock you, what do you expect.🤭😂😂😂

6. Some guys can deçeive ehn... They’ll be like “Baby I see my future kïds in your ëyes” Well-done sir chairmän of nationäl populatiøn censüs‚ Hopë you’re seëing golden morn‚ pampërs‚ schöol feës and othër baby foød on her foreheäd too?
Yeye 😏🙄😂😂😂

7. A soldiër💂wïll k!!! 1OO pëople and he wïll have peaçe‚ but you just ønly øne persøn for bl**d møney‚ the spirït wïll nøt let you rëst‚ why...? Don’t loøk at me likë am talkïng from experiencë oo... 😒🤭😂😂😂

8. I thïnk Adam is the causë of our failurë in English Languagë
God: Adam‚ wherë are you?
Adam: I am nakëd. 🙉🙄😂😂😂😂

10. Read this silently 😳😳😳😳
Dear lord don't let me die young with out living the life I have ever prayed for, write Amen with faith and believe.