SheRose Network

The only part of the voice recording that I left out is the part where you kept talking about what you were about to do to me s*xually which is exactly why I started talking about having PTSD & started crying.

You are in a relationship with another woman but still talking about having s*x with me & what you are about to do to me when you see me! You were talking about graphic things that happened when we have s*x so yes, of course I left that out of the recording. Why would I put that in?

Unlike how you try to keep me single me I'm not trying to keep you single because keeping you single will only have you coming after me even more! I don't want you single. I want you with someone else so you won't be bothering me! You already had everyone fighting against me trying to help you get to me. Of course I left that out! If I didn't leave that out you would be after me even more than you already were. I didn't want that problem.

The part of the recording where you were talking about what you were going to do to me s*xually was left out & I left it out so that you wouldn't lose your relationship you dumb ass bitch!

You said that it was left out, I didn't! Your dumb ass always telling on yourself! You want p***y so bad! You're such a fu***ng idiot!

Why are you not satisfied with the p***y you got is what I don't understand? Why you always trying f**k me? You got women. Go deal with them! Stick to them. Don't bring your ass back over here bothering me! I don't want you bothering me!

Let's be clear since you're always lying:

The part of the recording where you were talking about doing all of these things to me s*xually in graphic detail was left out to save your relationship because I'm not a jealous hater like you are!

I want you to be with somebody else (not me). You just don't want me to be with anybody!

You say I'm lying when you've proved that you've been stalking me for years on end & literally admitted to keeping me single & destroying all of my relationships. How am I lying & you admitted it?

Why is it so hard for you to say you don't want me to be with anybody? It makes no sense why you try to use our child to cover up your true feelings.

Why do you hide this? It's so easy to say I don't want her to be with nobody.

Jamal, why don't you care about how I feel? You are hurting me! You are hurting me all the time! You hurt me when you want to have s*x with me 24/7! You hurt me when you try to pretend like you're trying to see your daughter! You hurt me when you get in other relationships & use other women to cover the truth up. You hurt me when you try to make me out to be a liar when all I'm being is completely honest!

You think that because you don't physically put your hands on me, because you don't hit me, yell at me or argue with me that you don't hurt me but you have hurt me very badly Jamal.

Your lies have hurt my life tremendously!

You hurt me when you can be with someone else publicly but you won't let me get married. When I get in a relationship publicly you go behind the scenes & message that man I'm with. You tell him lies about me to break us up because you don't want anybody to be with me! That hurts Jamal especially when you do this just to keep me single!

You have completely traumatized me Jamal! I am traumatized to the point where I am afraid of being in another relationship. I'm afraid of trying to fall in love because I know for a fact you're going to ruin it & I'm going to get my heart broken again.

I cannot take my heart being broken again.

Just because you can't see my scars don't mean that they're not there. I cannot take this level of pain anymore. I just want to live my life & you will not let me simply just live! However you can live so your lies can look like the truth.

You hurt me when you wouldn't stop using our child to try to get to me to have s*x with me so I had to blast all of our personal business all over the internet.

Why do you think I would want the whole world in our personal life? Why would I want the whole entire world in our s*x life? Why would I want the world seeing intimate moments? Why in the hell would I want the world to know that I've been r***d & s*xually abused by you since I was a child?

This is my real life! This is not just a post on the internet. My real life is not a joke! These are very personal things that the world shouldn't know about! These things are way too sensitive for the world to just pick up, comment on, pick at or give their opinion about.

This is my child, my s*x life, r**e, s*xual abuse, my intimate moments, my marriage, my relationships, my religion & my childhood. My real life is not a got damn joke for the world to pick at or give their opinion about!

Because you wouldn't stop I had no choice but to put this on the internet & I hate you for forcing me to bring the world in on such sensitive subjects that the world should never know about. These things are way too personal!

Jamal, you have hurt me to the core of my soul! You have hurt me in ways that you could ever imagine & I will never forgive you for it!

You're always hurting me especially with the way that you're using our daughter to get access to me in order to r**e me. Using our baby girl to get access to me. You're always hurting my soul. 💔

You got me fired from my job because you're constantly lying & you cannot tell the truth! You are hurting me & our child! How are you not hurting me? You don't even want your child with a roof over her head or food to eat if I'm not having s*x with you. Then you got the nerve to say you're not hurting me!

You're definitely hurting me! You're hurting my kids too for no reason at all! All because I want to keep my body to myself! All I want to do is get married & you put me through all this s**t because I won't let you use our daughter to get access to me because I'm not fu***ng you!

You know that I'm a very good mother! You know how I am about taking care of my kids! That's f**ked up that you would do this to my children all because I won't have s*x with you!

You've definitely done & keep doing a whole lot to hurt me.

I always have to pay the price & suffer all the consequences for your lies.

Why do you keep using our child to paint a picture to the world that you don't want me? Especially when the truth is you're using our child to find a way in to get closer to me?

Why can't you just say that you want me? Why are you always lying like this?

You continue lie to try & break me but I refuse to allow you to break my soul.

SheRose Network Counseling | HE DOESN'T KEEP HER CLOSE WITH LOVE, HE KEEPS HER CLOSE WITH ILLUSIONS

He distorts reality by making separation feel impossible. He paints a world where every path leads back to him. He hides his intentions behind familiar words. "I want to see my child" becomes the doorway he uses to gain access to her. What appears to others as a caring father reaching for his child, to her is another cycle of control disguised as concern.

The illusion is so carefully crafted that on the outside people see connection where on the inside she sees captivity. They see family where she experiences fear. They see ordinary moments while she is navigating through the hidden motives beneath them.

This is what manipulation does, it blurs the black and white lines. It doesn't help you to see the picture clearly. This is how coercive control works. It blurs the boundaries between two figures until it's difficult to tell where she ends and where he begins. It creates confusion until you begin questioning your own reality. It makes it difficult to tell where her life ends and where his control begins. This is how trauma bonding works. It convinces everyone else that the picture on the outside is beautiful while she, on the inside is the only one who can feel the prison inside of it.

Healing begins the moment the illusion loses its power. The lines separate. The truth becomes visible. And what once looked like closeness is finally recognized for what it is. A carefully maintained illusion that always kept her within his reach.