Chasing The Tribe

✨ 5 months of River ✨

Our littlest love is five months old today 🥹🌸

This month has been such a big one, we’ve started introducing little tastes of breakfast as we gently begin our weaning journey. She’s still very much a milk babe though – breastfeeding is going amazing and it’s safe to say she much prefers mama’s milk to any bottles.

River has also well and truly claimed her “mummy’s girl” title 💕 She adores her cuddles with me and has started crying when daddy takes her now, we joke that she knows exactly what she wants already!

She’s growing so quickly, but still feels like my tiny baby. Five whole months of you, sweet girl, what a joy it is to watch you become more yourself each day 🤍

Just a girl in love with her dummy 💓
She’s growing up way too quickly 🥺

They say,
“You’re so lucky you get to stay home with your kids,” like it’s a break. Like it’s easy.

But they don’t see what it really looks like.
The hair that hasn’t been brushed in days.
The coffee you reheated three times and still didn’t drink.
The same stained t-shirt you wore yesterday.
The tears you wiped quickly so no one would notice. The never-ending to-do list running in your head, even at 3 a.m.

They didn’t hear the silence after the chaos,
or see you sitting on the floor wondering,
“Is this still me?” Not because you don’t love your babies with everything you have but because somewhere along the way, you stopped recognising yourself in the mirror.

They didn’t feel the loneliness,
the invisible load, the way you gave your body, your sleep, your energy, every little piece of you, because your babies needed you.
And you gave it, without question.
Even when it broke you a little.

We didn’t just “stay home.”
We built a whole world here.
Held it together with snacks and lullabies and deep breaths.
And that kind of love?
That kind of unseen, quiet, relentless love,
it changes everything.

Yes, we’re grateful.
So grateful.
But it’s also isolating in ways most people will never understand.

Anyone else feeling it today too?

✨ Happy 3 Months, River ✨

Three whole months of loving you, River 💗

This month has brought more change than I was ready for, River is slowly leaving that curled up newborn stage behind and becoming so alert, so aware, so here. She’s full of expression now, following our faces, beaming at her sister, and making the sweetest little sounds like she’s trying to join the conversation.

She’s growing so fast she’s already heading into 3–6 month clothes, something Evie never did this early! I still catch myself staring at her wondering how we got here so quickly.

And lately, I’ve noticed something that stops me in my tracks, she’s starting to really look like me. Just like her big sister Evie does. I can’t believe how much my girls resemble me, it’s surreal and honestly kind of healing. There’s something so special in seeing yourself reflected back in their little faces.

Breastfeeding is still going strong and I’m really proud to say we’re exclusively breastfeeding. It’s taken a lot of commitment, patience, and emotional energy, especially during those endless cluster feed days and nights. But we did it. I did it. And that means a lot to me.

This month I also started going back to the gym. Just gentle steps, but it feels good to begin doing something for me. I’ve realised how much I’ve lost confidence in myself over the years, and I want to start finding my way back. One day, I’d love to be able to afford a proper haircut and colour, it’s been over six years since I last did that for myself. It’s such a small thing, but it feels huge.

Of course, not every day looks calm or put together. There have been moments lately where I’ve had to walk outside just to breathe, when River’s been crying uncontrollably from teething, Evie’s been pushing boundaries, and everything’s felt loud and overstimulating. Those are the moments that stretch me, that test me, that remind me how much I’m carrying.

But even on the hardest days, there’s so much love. River has brought this soft, gentle light into our family, even when her cries fill the house, even when it’s chaos, she’s home.

Happy 3 months, my girl 🌸 You are deeply loved and so am I, even when I forget it.

It feels like just yesterday Evie was the baby in my arms, now she’s six, full of wonder, wit, and this gentle strength that takes my breath away. Watching her grow has always been a gift, but seeing her step into her role as River’s big sister has taken that love to a whole new level.

She’s so gentle with her, so proud. The way she strokes River’s tiny head, the way she whispers stories and sings lullabies like she’s known how to do it forever, it’s magic. She’s become this calm, nurturing presence, always ready with a cuddle or a kind word. And River? She already lights up at the sound of her big sister’s voice.

It’s in these little moments, when they’re curled up together, when Evie sneaks a kiss to River’s cheek, when she calls her ‘my baby’ that I see just how much she’s grown. And even though part of me aches at how fast time is flying, I’m also so proud. So proud of the girl Evie is becoming. She was born to be a big sister, and River is the luckiest to have her.

Swipe to see what our mornings look like now 🥹

The wildest thing about motherhood is how it can break you and build you all in the same breath.

I stood in this field holding the baby I grew inside me, watching my oldest daughter hold her with this instinctive tenderness… and it hit me. I’m the bridge between these two little souls. The beginning of their story. The safe place they return to.

And yet, some days I don’t feel like enough.
I lose my patience.
I grieve the version of me I used to be.
I stare at the chaos and feel like I’m drowning in the noise and the need.

But then there are these moments,soft, fleeting, full of light, where everything slows down.
Where I see them.
Where I see me.

Not the perfect mum.
Not the one who’s always calm or organised or thriving.
But the one who keeps showing up, who keeps loving through it all.

If you’re in the thick of it too…
If you’re tired and touched out and wondering if you’re doing any of it right
You’re not alone.
You’re doing better than you think.
And these babies of ours? They just want us. Messy, tired, real us.

💬 Tell me what’s been breaking you and building you lately in motherhood? I want to hear it. I want to hold space for it. Let’s be that kind of village here.

✨ Two whole months of River Rae ✨

Our girl is two months earthside and what a little light she is. Sleeping through the night (still shocked), smiling those big gummy smiles, and cooing like she’s already got stories to tell 🥹

Breastfeeding has become such a huge part of our days fully on demand, and it’s going so well. We’ve fed in the park, in the car, in quiet corners of car parks… things that would’ve made me panic not long ago. But we’re doing it. And I’m actually enjoying it.

It feels like healing especially after not really getting to breastfeed with Evie, my first baby, who I mostly exclusively pumped for. Different journeys, but both full of love.

And now, seeing Evie step into the role of big sister… it’s the most beautiful chaos. She adores her, and River lights up whenever she hears her voice.

Happy two months, River Rae 🌙
You’ve changed everything and somehow made it all feel more like home. 🩷

AD|GIFTED - I’ve always said it’s the little things that carry you through these newborn days.
A hot cup of tea, a long exhale, and this tiny bottle of magic for unsettled tummies 🍼

We started using Baby Drops a few weeks ago on behalf of and it’s made such a difference in those tricky evening hours. Less wind, less wriggling, more rest (for both of us).

Although this is an ad, I couldn’t not share because I know how much we mums pass things along that help 💛 𝐇𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞?

If you swipe all the way to the end you’ll see my morning breastfeeding essentials!

𝐎𝐧𝐞 𝐖𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐌𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐡 𝐨𝐟 𝐑𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐑𝐚𝐞 ❣︎

One whole month of you, sweet girl.
Of your little sighs and soft stretches. Of the way you don’t cry, just gently let us know you’re here with your quiet little noises.
Of you laying peacefully, staring off into the light like you’re already dreaming big.

You are the most content soul I’ve ever known.
One month of your wind smiles that melt me, your calm presence that somehow grounds our chaos.
One month of watching you fall in love with your big sister and her with you.
One month of watching you grow exactly as you should, just doing your thing in the most peaceful way.

And one month of me, too.
One month of exclusively breastfeeding you through the long nights, the cluster feeds, the moments I wasn’t sure I could keep going.
But we did it. I did it.
We’re doing this, River.

Happy 1 month earthside, baby girl.
You are magic. Please don’t grow so quickly! ❤︎︎

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐄𝐯𝐢𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐭 𝐑𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫 :
I don’t think I’ll ever forget the moment Evie met River.
Not in some dramatic, movie-scene way. No hospital room or grand reveal. Just a quiet, real-life moment in my parents’ living room—after school, in her uniform, still carrying the day with her.

We had just gotten home from the hospital. I was exhausted, sore, and holding our brand new baby girl like she was made of glass. Evie walked in and lit up like the whole world had just shifted. And maybe it had.

She gave me the biggest hug—tight, warm, like she’d been waiting days just to wrap her arms around me. Then, without skipping a beat, her eyes went straight to River.

No jealousy. No hesitation. Just pure, radiant joy.

“My baby sister,” she whispered, and I could feel my heart unravel right then and there. She knelt beside us, careful and calm, and just stared at her. Like River was the most fascinating thing she’d ever seen. And maybe she was.

I think I’d been so scared about this moment. About how Evie would react. About how I’d split myself between two. But in that moment, there was no fear. Just love. Thick, overwhelming, undeniable love.

Evie looked older that day. Not just in her uniform, but in her eyes. Like she understood that everything had changed—and she was ready.

And me? I was wrecked in the best way. Crying while trying to smile, exhausted while floating in something close to bliss. Watching my first baby meet my last.

I’ll hold onto that memory forever.
The day Evie met River.
The day my heart somehow doubled in size and cracked wide open all at once ❤︎︎

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐝.
It’s not just feeding the baby — it’s remembering what side I fed on last.
It’s noticing a rash, googling it at 3am, forgetting what I read by morning.
It’s tracking p**p, tracking naps, tracking my own mood swings — and theirs.

It’s knowing exactly where the nail clippers are but forgetting when I last ate.
It’s smiling when people visit, even though I’m leaking, aching, bleeding.
It’s being asked how the baby is 20 times — and wondering if anyone will ask about me.

I’m carrying so much right now. Some of it is beautiful.
Some of it is heavy and quiet and invisible.
But it’s all mine. And I’m holding it together the best I can.

No one really prepared me for this part.
The tabs in my brain are always open. And sometimes, it’s just a lot.

𝐈𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐨𝐨 — 𝐈 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐞!