KIS

Expected Death ~
When someone dies,
the first thing to do is nothing.

Don't run out and call the nurse.
Don't pick up the phone.

Take a deep breath and be present to the magnitude of the moment.

There's a grace to being at the bedside of someone you love as they make their transition out of this world.

At the moment they take their last breath, there's an incredible sacredness in the space.
The veil between the worlds opens.
You can almost feel the spirit leave the body.
Some cultures even open a window symbolizing that the spirit is about to leave,
or has left.

We're so unprepared and untrained in how to deal with death
that sometimes a kind of panic response kicks in.
"They're dead!"

We knew they were going to die, so their being dead is not a surprise.
It's not a problem to be solved. It's very sad,
but it's not cause to panic.
If anything, their death is cause to take a deep breath, to stop,
and be really present to what's happening.
If you're at home,
maybe put on the kettle and make a cup of tea.
Sit at the bedside
and just be present to the experience in the room.
What's happening for you?
What might be happening for them?
What other presences are here that might be supporting them on their way?
Tune into all the beauty and magic and the mystery.

Pausing gives your soul a chance to adjust,
because no matter how prepared we are, a death is still a shock.

If we kick right into "do" mode, and call 911, or call the hospice, we never get a chance
to absorb the enormity of the event.

Give yourself five minutes or 10 minutes, or 15 minutes just to be.
You'll never get that time back again if you don't take it now.

After that, do the smallest thing you can.

Call the one person who needs to be called.
Engage whatever systems need to be engaged, but engage them at the very most minimal level.

Move really, really, really, slowly, because this is a period where it's easy for body and soul to get separated.

Our bodies can gallop forwards, but sometimes our souls haven't caught up.
If you have an opportunity to be quiet and be present,
take it.
Accept and acclimatize and adjust to what's happening.
Then, as the train starts rolling, and all the things that happen after a death kick in, you'll be better prepared.

You won't get a chance to catch your breath later on. You need to do it now.

Stay with the body as long as you can.

There is no need to rush to call the funeral home.
When the funeral home arrives, don't panic.
They may ask you to leave the room as they are preparing the body to leave the space. You are not required to do this.
There is nothing scary about this process.

If you stay with your loved one, they will treat the body with the most care and respect.

If you want to follow your loved one to its next destination, that is your right You can stay close until you can no longer stay close.

You will have given yourself more time as the void begins to sink in.
You will know exactly where the body has gone for the next step of its departure.

This will allow you to remove the anxious part of the mystery.
Being present in the moments after death is an incredible gift to yourself, it's a gift to the people you're with, and it's a gift to the person who's just died. They're just a hair's breath away. They're just starting their new journey in the world without a body. If you keep a calm space around their body, and in the room, they're launched in a more beautiful way. It's a service to both sides of the veil.
After death.

When someone you love dies,, you don't lose them all at once. You lose little parts at a time, as slowly as the mail stops coming to their house in their name, and their scent fades from the pillows and the clothes in their closet. There is no specific end to this. It is different for everyone. Just about the time you may have thought you have said goodbye to each missing part, along may come another significant one. This is what it is like to lose someone you love.
Credit for the words
~ Sarah Kerr,
Ritual Healing Practitioner and Death Doula.
The Rev'd Dr. Suzi Robertson, Episcopal Priest and Pastor. Paraphrase from
John Irving's, "A Prayer For Owen Meany."

Repost: “99% OF PEOPLE CAN'T HANDLE THIS TRUTH ABOUT THEMSELVES

1. Most of your problems are not caused by other people.
They're caused by the habits, beliefs, excuses, and patterns you refuse to change.

2. You are often standing in your own way.
The biggest obstacle in your life is rarely the world. It's usually fear, procrastination, self-doubt, or comfort.

3. You repeat what you don't heal.
The same lessons keep returning in different forms until you finally learn them.

4. You teach people how to treat you.
What you tolerate, excuse, and allow eventually becomes your reality.

5. Many of your limitations exist only in your mind.
You have talked yourself out of more opportunities than life ever took away from you.

6. You don't always want the truth.
Sometimes you want comfort. Sometimes you want validation. Sometimes you want someone to tell you what you already believe.

7. The life you want requires a version of you that doesn't exist yet.
Growth is uncomfortable because it asks you to become someone new.

8. You are responsible for your reactions.
Life is not always your fault. But healing, growth, and your response are your responsibility.

9. You spend too much time thinking and not enough time doing.
Many people know exactly what they need to do. They just keep waiting for the perfect mood to do it.

10. Nobody is coming to save you.
The rescue you've been waiting for is often your own decision to finally take action.

11. Time is passing whether you change or not.
One year from now will arrive regardless. The question is who you'll be when it does.

12. One day, your life will end.
The frightening part is not death.

It's realizing how much of your life was spent worrying, hesitating, comparing, pleasing, and waiting instead of truly living.

The hardest truth to accept is this:

Your future is being created by what you do every day...

not by what you hope will happen someday.

The moment you stop blaming life...

stop blaming other people...

and stop waiting for perfect conditions...

you become powerful.

Because that's the moment you realize:

The person holding you back...

and the person who can set you free...

are often the same person.



”

HOW CAN I BE HAPPY WHEN THERE IS SO MUCH WRONG IN THE WORLD?
A wonderful answer by a Buddhist monk:

A man once asked an old Buddhist monk:

"How can I allow myself to feel happiness when the world is full of suffering, war, injustice, pain, and loss?"

The monk looked at him with compassion and asked:

"If your mother was sick,
would you stop eating?"

The man looked confused.

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because then there would be two people suffering instead of one."

The monk smiled.

"Exactly."

Then he continued:

"Many people believe that carrying the weight of the entire world on their shoulders is compassion."

"But often, it is only another form of suffering."

The man lowered his eyes.

"But every day I see bad news."

"I see people struggling."

"I see cruelty."

"And I feel guilty whenever I experience joy."

The monk nodded.

Then he pointed toward a small flower growing through a crack in a stone path.

"Look at that flower."

"It grows in a world of storms."

"It grows in a world where leaves fall, animals die, and winters come."

"Yet it still blooms."

The man stood silently.

The monk continued:

"The flower does not ignore suffering."

"It simply does not allow suffering to stop it from expressing its nature."

Then the monk asked:

"If every kind-hearted person became hopeless...

who would remain to help others?"

The man's eyes widened.

The monk continued:

"The world does not need more exhausted souls."

"It needs more people with enough peace inside them to share it."

"Enough hope to inspire it."

"Enough strength to carry it."

The man whispered,

"So being happy is not selfish?"

The monk smiled gently.

"No."

"Selfishness is turning away from suffering."

"Happiness is keeping your heart open despite it."

Then he added:

"Be grateful for your meal."

"Call your parents."

"Help your neighbor."

"Smile at a stranger."

"Be kind to someone who is hurting."

"You do not heal the world by carrying all its pain."

"You heal the world by reducing the pain you touch."

Tears filled the man's eyes.

For the first time, he understood.

His happiness was not a betrayal of those who suffered.

It was fuel for helping them.

And the monk said one final thing:

"Protect your inner peace."

"Because a candle that burns itself out cannot give light to anyone."

"A peaceful heart is not escaping the world...

it is serving the world in the most powerful way possible."

Yeppers’’nbn
Repost

WHAT YOUR EMOTIONS REVEAL ABOUT YOU

1. Fear: You are standing near change. Growth often feels dangerous before it feels freeing.

2. Anxiety: You are trying to control what cannot fully be controlled. Breathe, soften, and trust life more.

3. Guilt: You are carrying the past too heavily. Learn the lesson, forgive yourself, and move forward.

4. Helplessness: You have been strong for too long alone. Allow support, rest, and softness into your life.

5. Confusion: One version of your life is ending while another has not fully begun yet. Give yourself patience.

6. Despair: Your soul feels trapped, but sometimes endings create space for completely new beginnings.

7. Emptiness: You have become disconnected from yourself. Slow down and return inward again.

8. Regret: You wish things had happened differently. Take the wisdom and release the punishment.

9. Insecurity: You fear losing something important. Remember: what is truly meant for you does not require fear to keep it.

10. Resentment: You have ignored your own needs for too long. Boundaries are necessary for peace.

11. Envy: Something inside you recognizes a desire you have not fully allowed yourself to pursue yet.

12. Anger: Your boundaries, values, or pain are asking for attention. Listen carefully instead of exploding blindly.

13. Loneliness: Your heart is craving deeper connection, understanding, and emotional safety.

14. Jealousy: You fear comparison, replacement, or not feeling enough. Often it points toward unhealed self-worth.

15. Overthinking: Your mind is searching for certainty in an uncertain world.

16. Burnout: You have been giving more energy than your mind, body, or soul can restore.

17. Numbness: Your nervous system became overwhelmed and chose shutdown as protection.

18. Sadness: Something inside you needs gentleness, grieving, rest, or acknowledgment.

19. Impatience: You are resisting the timing of life instead of flowing with it.

20. People-pleasing: You learned that acceptance felt safer than authenticity.

21. Shame: A part of you still believes your mistakes define your worth.

22. Withdrawal: You are protecting yourself from disappointment, rejection, or emotional exhaustion.

23. Hope: Despite everything, your soul still believes healing and better days are possible.

Your emotions are not enemies.

They are messages.
Signals.
Wounds.
Needs.
Unspoken truths asking to be understood.

Healing begins when you stop fighting your emotions…
and start listening to what they are trying to teach you.

HOW TO BECOME EMOTIONALLY UNBREAKABLE

1. Stop reacting immediately
Your first reaction is often emotional, not wise. Create a pause. In that space, you choose your response instead of being controlled by impulse.

2. Accept what you can’t control
Trying to control people, outcomes, or situations creates frustration. Peace begins when you focus only on what is in your hands—your actions and attitude.

3. Stay calm in chaos
Anyone can stay calm when things are easy. Real strength is remaining steady when everything around you feels unstable.

4. Never let anger make decisions
Anger is temporary, but decisions made in anger have lasting consequences. Step back, cool down, then decide.

5. Don’t expect closure from others
Not everyone will explain, apologize, or give you answers. Learn to close your own chapters without needing their permission.

6. Learn to detach gracefully
Detachment isn’t coldness—it’s clarity. It means caring without losing yourself, and walking away when something disturbs your peace.

7. Use pain as fuel for growth
Pain can break you or build you. Channel it into discipline, self-improvement, and deeper understanding of yourself.

8. Choose peace over unnecessary conflict
Not every argument needs your participation. Protect your energy by walking away from what doesn’t add value.

9. Emotional discipline creates mental freedom
When you control your emotions, you stop being controlled by situations. This is where true freedom begins.

10. Protect your energy like it’s non-negotiable
Your time, attention, and emotions are limited. Be selective about where you invest them.

11. Train your mind daily, not only in hard moments
Mental strength isn’t built during crisis—it’s built in daily habits like reflection, mindfulness, and discipline.

You don’t become unbreakable by avoiding life…
you become unbreakable by mastering yourself within it.

Calm mind. Strong heart. Clear boundaries.