Intimately U

Okay...fall has officially entered the chat. 😂🍂

I had to bring out Pumpkin Vanilla Marshmallow because apparently I wasn't ready to let summer go without making the transition smell good.

It's sweet, warm, cozy and gives you that “I want to stay home today” feeling.

Which, let's be honest, isn't always a bad thing. 😂

This is one of our limited fall scents, so it won't be hanging around forever.

If you're looking for something cozy for your space, or an easy little gift for someone who loves fall, this is it.

Pumpkin Vanilla Marshmallow is available now at intimatelyu.ca. 🤎

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about where my energy is actually going.

Because entrepreneurship will have you thinking everything is urgent. 😂

You have an idea? Do it.

See something that needs fixing? Fix it.

Think of something new? Add it.

And before you know it, you're busy all day and still wondering what actually moved the business forward.

So I’m looking at things differently.

What actually deserves my energy?

What is bringing revenue in?

What is building the right relationships?

What is getting Intimately U in front of the right people?

What am I doing simply because I’ve convinced myself I should?

I don't want to be busy.

I want to be productive.

There's a difference.

So that's where my head is right now.

Less doing for the sake of doing.

More intention behind where I put my time, energy and attention.

Let's see what happens when I actually stick to that. 🤎

Can I say something?

Not everything you’re struggling to keep up with is because you need more discipline.

And I say that as somebody who will absolutely tell myself, “Girl, get your s**t together.” 😂

Sometimes that IS the conversation I need to have with myself.

But sometimes I’m trying to force a strategy that doesn’t fit my actual life.

There’s a difference.

We see somebody doing something that’s working and think:

Maybe I need to post like that.

Run my business like that.

Wake up at that time.

Take on that many things.

Be in every room.

Say yes to every opportunity.

And then when we can’t maintain it, we start questioning ourselves.

Meanwhile, nobody stopped to ask:

Does this even fit me?

My personality?

My capacity?

The season of life I’m in?

The way I actually work best?

I'm learning there is a big difference between making excuses for yourself and knowing yourself.

Sometimes I need more discipline.

Sometimes I need a better strategy.

Wisdom is learning which one I’m dealing with.

That’s something I’ve been thinking about a LOT lately.

What about you?

Have you ever realized the problem wasn't that you weren't trying hard enough, but that the way you were doing it just wasn't working for you?

I’ve been thinking about consistency differently lately.

I used to think being consistent meant you didn’t miss.

If you said every Tuesday, then every Tuesday it better be. 😂

If you made a plan, stick to the plan.

And listen… I still believe in doing what you said you were going to do.

But I also live in the real world. 😂

Sometimes life throws some stuff at you and the plan you made on Sunday does NOT care about what showed up on Wednesday.

That doesn’t mean the goal suddenly doesn’t matter.

It doesn’t mean you’re lazy.

And it definitely doesn’t mean you need to throw the whole thing away because you missed a few days.

Sometimes consistency looks like:

Alright. That week didn’t go how I planned. Let me get back to it.

No big announcement.

No waiting until Monday.

No “I’ll start again next month.”

Just come back.

I’m learning to give myself a whole lot more room for that.

Because I’d rather keep coming back to something that matters to me than quit because I couldn’t do it perfectly.

So if you’ve been off track with something lately…

You don’t need a brand new plan.

Maybe you just need to come back to the one you already made. 🤎

I used to say “sorry” before I’d even done anything wrong for asking questions, setting boundaries, or taking up space. That ends now. In my latest post, I share how I noticed the pattern, the small shifts that helped me stop apologizing, and how you can start owning your presence too. Read more: https://wix.to/Vrhi0Ui

Listen… saying no when something is BAD is one thing.

Saying no when something is actually GOOD?

Whole different story. 😂

I’ve had to learn this one in business and in my personal life.

Because if an opportunity sounds good, could get my name in another room, help me grow, or possibly lead to something bigger, my first thought used to be:

Okay, how can I make this work?

Not:

Kyla, do you actually have room for this right now? 😂

And there is a difference.

Because I CAN make a lot of things work.

That doesn’t mean I should.

Sometimes making it work means something else gets pushed back.

Sometimes it means I’m tired as hell trying to keep up with everything I already said yes to.

And sometimes the opportunity really is good — I’m just not in the right season to take it on.

That’s part of why I created the Decision Filter inside Return to You.

Before I give another yes, I’m learning to ask myself:

Do I have room for this?

What is it going to require from me?

And what am I going to have to move around to make it happen?

I’m not always going to get it right.

But I’m getting a whole lot better at not treating every opportunity like it’s my only opportunity.

Because it isn’t. 🤎

This page is from my Return to You guided journal, available on Amazon.

And I’m curious…

Which is harder for you: saying no to something you DON’T want to do, or saying no to something you actually want but know you don’t have room for right now?

September is almost here, and I don't want to ask you what your goals are.

I want to ask you something a little different.

What are you making room for in September?

Maybe it's rest.

Maybe it's better boundaries.

Maybe it's finally starting something you've been talking yourself out of.

Maybe it's spending more time with your family.

Maybe it's getting serious about something you want for yourself.

Or maybe September isn't about adding anything at all.

Maybe you're making room by letting something go.

Less overcommitting.

Less explaining yourself.

Less saying yes when you really mean no.

Less carrying everyone else's expectations.

We spend so much time asking ourselves what we need to do next.

Sometimes we need to ask what we want to have space for next.

So that's our Sunday check-in:

What are you making room for in September?

Drop yours below. It can be a whole paragraph or just one word. 🤎

One of the most expensive lessons I've learned in business is that access to me cannot be unlimited.

I had to learn this one the hard way.

For a long time, I thought being a good person meant being available.

If I knew something, I'd share it.

If somebody needed help, I'd try to help.

If someone wanted advice, I'd give it.

If the phone rang, I'd answer.

And when you're naturally someone who wants to see other people win, it's very easy to convince yourself that constantly giving is just who you are.

But business taught me something:

You can have a good heart and still have boundaries.

My time has value.

My ideas have value.

My experience has value.

And my energy absolutely has value.

That doesn't mean I've stopped helping people. I haven't.

It means I've become more intentional about who gets access to me, how much access they get and what I'm willing to give away.

Because every hour I spend pouring into something that isn't mine is an hour I'm not pouring into the business, the vision and the people I'm responsible for.

And I've worked too hard to build Intimately U to keep treating my own capacity like it's unlimited.

One of the biggest shifts I've made as a founder is realizing:

Protecting what I'm building also means protecting the woman building it.

That's not ego.

That's stewardship.

And I wish I had learned it sooner.