Nancy Gilette RDI Consultant

Nancy Gilette RDI Consultant

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Providing RDI Services & Support for Parents of Autistic Children & Teens.

I have dedicated two decades of my life to following the passion of my career, supporting families with children/teens with Autism and various other special needs in BC and Alberta. After completing my post-secondary education at Thompson Rivers University and Vancouver Island University, I began my incredible journey in the Autism field. That eventually led to me opening my successful private pra

06/20/2026

Ever had your child melt down in a public place?

Maybe they dropped to the floor.
Maybe they ran away.
Maybe they screamed, cried, or hit.....
and suddenly it feels like every eye in the room is on you.

As parents, caregivers, and professionals, it's easy to feel pressure to get the behaviour under control as quickly as possible.
I've been there many times...

As both a parent and professional, I've experienced countless moments where a child was struggling in a public space and all I wanted was for everyone to stop looking.

But here's the shift:
👉Your job isn't to make everyone else comfortable.
👉Your job is to help your child through the experience.

If children could simply stop a behaviour because we asked them to, they would and we wouldn't have a child having a challenging moment...duh! hehehe
Instead of asking:
"How do I stop this?"
Try asking:
"What might my child be communicating and what can I do to help?"
Behaviour is communication
Often, what we see on the outside is a sign that something is happening underneath:
💛 Overwhelm
💛 Anxiety
💛 Frustration
💛 Confusion
💛 Difficulty with regulation
When we understand behaviour differently, we can respond differently.

Not by excusing behaviour.
Not by ignoring it.
But by helping our children learn, regulate, recover, and develop new ways of navigating difficult situations over time :)

06/18/2026

Who Knew...Over 25 years ago, I started this work because I wanted to help children. The children who were misunderstood, Judged, Confused..

The ones just trying to get along in a world that didn't always make sense to them. What surprised me was how much of the work became helping the environment around the child.

Being a parent is hard.. and as I met so many amazing families and with my own journey.. Us parents are doing the best we can..in world that is confusing with soo many demands and the truth is... parenting is complex, it's dynamic.

There is no "how-to" manual for parenting a neurodivergent child.....There are more questions, decisions, advocating and learning.

Trying to understand what your child needs while also trying to support yourself and your family..bah..there is soo much to navigate!

I was a professional and had all this insight.. but truth is ..When I became a parent it changed... (I still chuckled at what I used to say before kids!! Lol)..It pushed me to think differently.

To dig deeper.
To become more reflective.
To find out what truly supports an neurodivergent brain (thank you RDI!)

I had to let go of old assumptions and find a different way forward.
And through all these years, I've realized that the greatest gift I can offer parents isn't a perfect strategy or a quick fix.

It's a opportunity to shift to different perspective.

Because when we begin to see behavior differently, understand regulation differently, and view our children through a lens of curiosity, everything starts to shift.

Want to learn more about what I am talking about.. pm me!

Photos from Nancy Gilette RDI Consultant's post 06/16/2026

I am SO excited to offer The Autism Shift: Summer Edition! ☀️

This series is designed to provide parents and caregivers with a different perspective on autism...one that focuses on understanding, engagement, regulation, and supporting development.. at any age!

Together, we'll explore simple, practical strategies that can help you:
✨ Better understand behaviour
✨ Support emotional regulation
✨ Foster social development and independence
✨ Create more connection in everyday moments
Join me and other families this summer as we learn, reflect, and discover a different way forward.

PM me for more info :)

06/02/2026
05/22/2026

Let’s talk about change....because for many families, this is hard.
So many parents notice that challenging behaviour shows up when:
¡ routines change
¡ something unexpected happens
¡ the TV gets turned off
· there’s a transition to a new environment

This has been a conversation I’ve had for over 20 years. We often hear, “autism doesn’t like change.” But the real question is why?

It’s not about being stubborn or oppositional. It’s because the brain isn’t prepared to make the mental shift. When the brain isn’t ready, the body reacts—and that’s where dysregulation shows up.

This is why transition supports matter.

I’ve been giving my own child consistent transition warnings for over 10 years. Why? Because it supports regulation. It helps her brain get ready so that the unexpected doesn’t automatically lead to a challenging moment—she can move through the transition regulated.

Change happens all the time. The goal isn’t to avoid it—it’s to support it.
And because our kids are still developing (research shows brain development continues until about age 25—and for some, even longer), they need support. That’s not a failure. That’s development.

Transition supports might include:
¡ visual schedules
¡ timers
¡ alarms
¡ reminders
¡ whatever works for your child

But here’s the important part: the tool alone isn’t enough.
As parents and caregivers, we need to model how the support is used so it becomes meaningful and functional.

For example:
“I’m going to set a timer for myself so I can stop scrolling on my phone.”
That’s modelling. That’s teaching the purpose of the tool.
Sometimes I hear, “My child hates timers—it’s too much pressure.” And that’s important information.

We need to ask:
¡ Was the expectation too big?
¡ Was the demand realistic?
¡ Could the child stop in the middle of something engaging?

It’s not about forcing the transition, or thinking its only one tool...it’s about partnering with the brain and teaching how to shift.

"Changes is part of life. Transitions are unavoidable.
But dysregulation doesn’t have to be"

With the right supports, taught intentionally, we can help autistic children move through change with more confidence, safety, and regulation...and help your child experience regulation when change happens..

04/08/2026

Spring Break puppy! We got Joey 2 weeks ago and I can’t imagine our world without him💜💜

04/02/2026

Autism isn’t something that needs to be fixed.
It’s something that needs to be understood.

April 2 is Autism Awareness Day…and autism isn’t just one day for me (and most of you reading this) ... it’s part of my life, every single day… and I truly love it. 💛

Let’s take a moment to celebrate the beauty of neurodiversity and the authenticity that comes through autism (even the hard times of dysregulation, overwhelmed and exhausting at times)--cause that alone is something to celebrate-> reliance at its finest.

Being on this journey (with families with children, teens, and adults) is a deeply meaningful experience. It’s has shaped how I see the world, how I connect, and how I support others.

I feel incredibly grateful to have built my career within the autism community. Through my work, lived experiences, and learning (including RDI), I’ve come to understand what it means to live more authentically and intentionally to create a quality of life.

Autism isn’t about fitting into a mold.

It’s about understanding, supporting, and nurturing each person’s unique way of being ...while building skills that support a meaningful quality of life.

Let’s continue to grow awareness, shift perspectives, and lead with understanding and respect for autistic individuals ... today and every day.🤘👏

04/23/2025

When Grocery Shopping Feels Impossible ✨

Ever been here?

You walk into the store—list in hand, plan in mind.
You’ve done this before. You know what needs to happen.

But your autistic child? Yeah… they’ve got other plans.

🔆 The lights? Too bright.
🔊 The sounds? Way too much.
💨 The plan? Falling apart faster than you can say, “Here, take my phone.”

You feel their anxiety rising.
You feel your own regulation slipping.
But the groceries still need to get done.

So what do you do? Take a moment.. thats it..
You pause.
You breathe.
You meet them where they are and be curious what can I do to help (rather than focusing on control of behaviour).

✨ Find a role (hello co-regulation) something simple and predictable to keep them engaged.

🛒 “Child can hold the apple bag open, and I’ll put the apples in.”
📋 “Can you help me check this off the list?”

It’s not about rushing through.
It’s about reframing the moment so it works for both of you.

Small shifts make a world of difference difference.
Understanding behaviour = Less stress and more connection.

What’s worked for you during errands? Drop a tip below or DM me..I love hearing what’s helped other families.
OR even better... come join me in my group today for more insight in everyday life!

04/15/2025

And just like that… the evening is here... le sigh

Us parents raising kids in this busy world with different needs..we are doing all. the. things.
Some of you have completely shifted your whole lifestyle to be there for your child.
Some work from home. Some chose homeschooling because the traditional system just wasn’t built for their kid. And some didn’t..but regardless parents continue to show up in incredible ways....in ways most people don’t even see or understand.

Whatever your situation—one thing’s for sure:

🤪 "Some days, balance feels like a total joke. 🤯 It's sooo overwhelming at times!"

You’re juggling work, therapies, lesson plans, meltdowns, special interests, food requests, life stuff…and just when you finally sit down to breathe...you hear a crash from the kitchen…
An “ugh” from the bedroom…or feel the first wave of a sensory storm rolling in...
Whether it’s your child’s or (let’s be honest) your own. 🤬

You’re being pulled in every direction.

Because you care. So... Damn... Much....

You want to show up for your child, for your work, and still have energy left for yourself.
But sometimes—you .just .don’t.

Here’s the hard truth...stop doing so much..you are doing already doing too much.

✨ "It’s not about doing more… it’s about doing what matters most."

When you find strategies that actually fit your child and your life, things start to click.
Not perfect..but progress occurs in small, meaningful shifts....and those shifts? They change everything.👍

💛 This is the shift Autism needs. A life that’s authentic to your child and your family.
Because everything is "figureoutable" --thank you

Wanna learn more and hear more conversations?
Check out my page or visit my Linktree for support, resources, and a different perspective to help you create a life that actually helps.

02/25/2025

You had it all planned out:

A family outing.
A shared meal.
A trip to the park

But then… it all unraveled.
You're child/teen got frustrated.
You got frustrated.
And that time you’d set aside for connection? It turned into stress.

Here’s the thing:
good intentions are a great start, but ----without strategies, they can fall short.

When we approach these moments with flexibility and curiosity—asking what they need and what you need—we can shift the focus. Instead of chaos, we create space for learning and building skills together.

✨ Let’s talk: What’s one thing you’ve reframed or adapted to better connect with your neurodivergent child/teen? Share your wisdom in the comments—I’d love to hear it!

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