Up Front Coach

Great questions are simple. Their impact focuses our thoughts and may even gift us with a different way of looking at things. The other day I listened to a podcast and was introduced to author Sahil Bloom. He wrote a book called “The 5 Types of Wealth”.

During the interview he posed a great question: Do you know what your enough looks like? A quick reminder. Enough is defined as “as much or as many as required.”

His list of five types of wealth includes: time, social, mental, physical and financial. When you think of any or all of these things, or even something completely different do you know what your enough looks like?

Understanding that the idea of "enough" is deeply personal, and will change over time, take a moment to reflect - honestly and gently - on those things you’d like to pursue more of, and where you can appreciate the beauty of already having enough.

About halfway through my 30’s, my role as a Production Manager was no longer filling my bucket. I was eager to grow my skills and experience differently and fortunately, I knew exactly what that was: I wanted to start a career in Human Resources.

I had recently completed some aptitude testing and career exploration and was confident this was the right path for me. As excited and determined as I was, I was still faced with some serious doubts.

(Self) Why couldn’t I find contentment with what I had already achieved? (Because at the time, changing employers was common, but changing professions was not).

(Family) How would my partner react when I told him I wanted to quit my full-time job, go back to school and then start over when I was done?

(Society) What would others think about me quitting a perfectly good job to see if something other than what I was doing would be a better fit for me?

In a transition, acknowledging and understanding these threats is key factor in being able to positively leverage change to move forward and grow. It’s where we determine what is true for us, where we make decisions about what’s most important for us, and trust that who we will become will be who we want to be.

Transition resistant or transition ready? Given the situation, we may find ourselves a little bit of both. Understanding the behaviors and emotions that accompany a transition helps us manage our mindset so we can successfully move through it.

My reason was that I wanted to work in an environment that aligned with my values. Even though at the time, I had no idea what that even meant.

I hired a coach and five months later landed the best job of my entire career.

I learned something recently about peace. You can be a keeper or a maker.

I’ve been both.

A peacekeeper strives to maintain harmony, and in doing so, can be reluctant to share opinions and feelings for fear of how others may react or respond. Useful in some situations for sure, classic avoidance behavior in others. When I’ve shown up as peacekeeper, I’ve been focused on bringing harmony, and I realize now, what I was really doing was maintaining the status quo.

Peacemaking is different. It’s proactive. Peacemakers actively engage in conflict - within themselves and between others – with a goal of bringing resolution. They agreeably disagree and share their thoughts and feelings with honesty in a way that doesn’t diminish the other person. It’s a long game that requires courage and a desire to move forward.

My takeaway? Focus on being mindful over being reactive. That helps me read the room so I can see which peace is needed most.

What’s next when you recognize you’re ready to change the way you share your gifts? That’s a question a client of mine was pondering this week.

Transitions give us the opportunity to reimagine and redefine how we live our lives. They help us shift our focus from what’s changing to what’s emerging.

When you practice transition intelligence (TQ) you’ll find you’re willing to adjust the way you see things as you become more flexible and open to change. You’re more comfortable seeking out others who can offer you encouragement and guidance, and you regularly employ strategies that build your resilience.

And your gifts grow with you.

My first coach once shared a powerful truth with me that has stayed with me ever since:

"EVERYONE IS DOING THEIR BEST."

Imagine if I told you that you did your best today. How would that resonate with you? Would you nod in agreement? Or would you immediately reflect on areas where you could have improved or acted differently? Perhaps you'd ponder on what 'best' truly means to you. Maybe tomorrow you'd strive even harder, or perhaps you'd find peace in the realization that your best effort is exactly what it needs to be.

Consider this: what if I revealed that everyone you interacted with today was also giving their best? How does that revelation alter your perspective?

It's often said that perspective can transform everything. This is why coaching holds such transformative power.

Each stage of a transition carries its own emotional signature. Because transitions begin with something that's ending, feelings of loss, fear and grief may be the first emotions that emerge.

Resistance is common at this stage, so it may take some time before we recognize and accept an ending is occurring. So we hang on.

Working with a coach can help you validate and find meaning in your emotions. We support our clients to let go on their terms, building resilience along the way so space is created for what’s next.

A client recently shared an example of an instance when she was not impecable with her word. It created a situation that escalated and had the potential to impact her professional reputation.

Her experience reminded me to pay more attention to my own words, the ones I use or choose not to, how I present them and staying ever mindful of their impact.

We are living in a time when being impeccable has never been more important.

In a transition, something ends, and that may require us to adjust how we think anout ourselves. Our identity. Being aware of our mindset through this process helps smooth the way. In a fixed mindset, we may feel like giving up when something seems too difficult, dismiss feedback as criticism, or feel threatened by the success of others. In this state, our focus is on proving ourselves. A growth mindset focuses on improving – persevering through challenges, being open to learning from missteps and mistakes, and defining success as learning and growing.

Vancouver Island FB friends...a reminder when you select Echo Valley Farms potatoes at the grocery store, you're buying local AND Canadian!