Wild Divine Studio

New large textured painting 🖼️ 🍁

Available now
https://bluethumb.com.au/alluringart/Artwork/falling-1189220

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Sooooooo true!

Copied from someone else’s page, but so accurate.
If you haven’t self reflected and evolved, then you will always just want to be “right”. No matter what the circumstance.

When people know they have hurt someone, a few different things can happen:

1. They avoid the person because of guilt or shame.
* Being around the person reminds them of what they did.
* An apology would require admitting they were wrong.
* Avoidance becomes easier than facing uncomfortable emotions.
2. They rewrite the story in their minds.
* Instead of seeing themselves as the one who caused harm, they focus on what the other person did wrong.
* This reduces their guilt and protects their self-image.
* They may genuinely come to believe their version of events.
3. They fear consequences.
* Accountability might require an apology, restitution, or a change in behavior.
* Some people are not willing to pay that emotional price.
4. They lack the emotional maturity to repair relationships.
* Healthy repair requires humility, empathy, and discomfort tolerance.
* Not everyone has developed those skills.
5. Sometimes they don’t believe they did anything wrong.
* What feels obvious to the injured person may not feel obvious to the other person.
* Two people can experience the same event very differently.

One thing I’ve noticed is that avoidance by itself doesn’t prove guilt. People avoid for many reasons. However, when someone repeatedly refuses conversation, refuses accountability, refuses curiosity about your experience, and refuses repair, it often tells you something important about their capacity—not necessarily about your worth.

In situations of family estrangement, this can be especially painful because the silence leaves a vacuum. It’s natural to wonder, “Do they know what they did?” Sometimes they do. Sometimes they don’t. Sometimes they know part of it but not all of it.

The more useful question is often:
“Regardless of what they know, are they currently willing and able to participate in repair?”

Those are different questions.

A person can know they caused harm and still not be willing to face it. A person can even miss you deeply and still avoid you because facing the relationship would require confronting uncomfortable truths about themselves.

The tragedy is that awareness and accountability are not the same thing. Many people have the first without ever reaching the second.

Lesson learned. Not everyone who says they care about you actually does 🤔😒

Wow, so true!