Cuban trapzen RSA

Man Released From Prison, Steals Again, Gets Beaten By Community, Taken To Hospital, Steals Nurse’s Cellphone, Gets Handcuffed, Steals Handcuffs

ALEXANDRA — South African authorities are reportedly considering promoting a local man to “Most Consistent Employee of the Year” after he allegedly maintained an uninterrupted commitment to theft despite prison time, public beatings, medical treatment, and handcuffs.

The man, whose identity has not been released because police keep losing the paperwork whenever he walks past it, was reportedly released from prison on Monday morning after serving time for theft-related crimes.

According to residents, celebrations were short-lived.

“By lunch time he was already back at work,” said one community member proudly. “Some people struggle to find jobs after prison, but this guy? Straight back into his profession. Very dedicated.”

Witnesses say the suspect allegedly stole groceries, two extension cords, a kettle, and “possibly somebody’s WiFi signal” before residents finally caught him hiding behind a spaza shop pretending to be a Coca-Cola fridge.

Community members allegedly gave the suspect “a free motivational seminar using open hands and slippers” before police arrived on the scene.

“He was lying there promising to change his life,” said another resident. “But even while apologising he allegedly stole someone’s flip-flop.”

Police then transported the injured suspect to a nearby hospital for treatment.

Doctors reportedly treated bruises, swelling, and what one nurse described as “advanced criminal confidence.”

However, hospital staff quickly realised they had not admitted an ordinary patient.

While receiving treatment, the suspect allegedly stole a nurse’s cellphone while she was checking his blood pressure.

“She turned around and suddenly her phone was gone,” said a hospital source. “The shocking part is he allegedly used the phone to Google ‘how to remove handcuffs permanently.’”

U girlfriend cheated on u with him .. what's ur next move?🤣

Patiently Waiting for Valentine😎

When u are feared and also stupid 🙂

Lil man but tougher than me..Love u champ❤️💯