Resilient Leadership Coaching and Consulting

I have Olympic fever. The lessons in leadership, resilience and team cooperation are all over the place and I am inspired! I have been thinking a lot about the difference between pushing through and listening in.

The comeback stories of Simone Biles and Alysa Liu reminded me that real resilience is not about overriding ourselves. It is about honoring what is true and responding with care.

This article is my reflection on what their journeys reveal about the alchemy of rest, recovery, and wholeness.

"There is a version of resilience that is performative. It is more aptly called relentlessness: powering through so no one questions your strength. Then there is a version of resilience that is integrated: telling the truth, choosing health, and returning from a place that is aligned. These high-performing athletes did not simply push past what was misaligned. They integrated the parts of themselves that had fallen out of coherence. That integration is alchemy. Biles and Liu did not just win gold. I believe they manifested it by summoning the disparate parts of themselves back into wholeness."

The Alchemy of Resilience: How Simone Biles and Alysa Liu Turned Recovery Into Gold Rest as a Form of Integrity There is a version of resilience that is performative. It is more aptly called relentlessness: powering through so no one questions your strength. Then there is a version of resilience that is integrated: telling the truth, choosing health, and returning from a place that...

Anthropic’s recent study on AI and software engineering caught my attention. Of course, it showed gains in productivity, but it also revealed insights on the human side.

Engineers shared that while using AI, they “need colleagues less” and that junior team members ask fewer questions. That pattern isn’t limited to tech. It is a preview of what many professions are facing and will contend with in the future.

From the Leadership Lens:

Mentorship becomes less organic.
When AI is the first stop to ask for help, we miss the interactions that build trust, confidence and relationship. When I ask leaders what they love about leading, it is almost always the connection aspect. We feel our contribution in the human exchanges. When we transfer our experience and knowledge into mentorship, we feel valuable.

Leadership development gets flatter.
People may advance technically while missing the deeper developmental experiences that come through dialogue, modeling, and reflection. Yes! It is uncomfortable to say “I don’t know” and “I need help” but it is in the discomfort that we grow. AI is removing the discomfort of being a beginner but that is a developmental level no human gets to skip (to then become a mature leader one day).

Collaboration get quieter.
When work becomes “AI+me”, we lose the spark of innovation. We need to hear the silly ideas that spark the breakthrough solutions. We miss the camaraderie that comes from toiling over a tough problem. Of course AI is a fantastic tool that gives us the perfect answer in moments! But we need to find ways to fill in the gaps for connection, belonging and being in struggle together. We are built for bonding. The kind of bonding that comes from working together.

The meaning and purpose we derive from work is more than productivity. We saw productivity go up but innovation go down when the pandemic pushed us to home offices. On the horizon is more isolation and disconnection with AI.

Don’t get me wrong, I use AI. I love having a personal assistant at my fingertips! I also work from a home office most days. Both of those experiences have me longing for deeper connection on the days I am not on-site with clients. What I am noticing in my coaching conversations and across teams is that as we lose the natural connection points and bypass developmental milestones, we miss opportunities to grow and feel a sense of purpose. I am not opposed to AI, just curious about how we fill in the gaps it is creating. I am looking inward and to my coaching colleagues to do what we do best: address the universal human needs in the workplace.

In an AI-loaded future, our greatest differentiators will be emotional capacity, trust and presence. We are still human, hard-wired for connection, after all.

How AI Is Transforming Work at Anthropic How AI Is Transforming Work at Anthropic

10 pieces of well-worn life advice you may need to hear right now We asked experts what life advice they keep on steady rotation. Here are 10 tried-and-true tips from therapists, career coaches and writers.

One of the hottest topics for leaders is how to deliver *actionable* feedback. Here are 8 steps for creating a reciprocal learning dialogue that will support employee development and engagement.

Offering Actionable 1:1 Feedback Charlene Wilson, Resilient Leadership

Time Management! Here are the top ten time management pain points are described by leaders and their teams- Along with 5 sets of questions you can use to coach yourself toward a shift in your relationship with time

https://medium.com//coaching-yourself-through-the-top-ten-time-management-pain-points-bebecc3f4968

I've been feeling particularly tender in the last week. Before bed last night, I felt a heaviness in my chest that I recognized as grief. This morning, a client shared this article with me. It helped me name the ache I have been experiencing. Maybe you are feeling some of the grief from the last year, too? You are not alone.

It’s OK to Grieve for the Small Losses of a Lost Year There is a name for grief that isn’t routinely acknowledged: disenfranchised grief.

1. APPRECIATION: While there were sad and frustrating experiences during social distancing, there were also changes that people welcomed. Take the time to appreciate lessons learned and positive experiences. Many people found aspects of the structural changes to be beneficial. Acknowledge and appreciate!

2. CLARITY: Some people report a sense of clarity discovered through the changes experienced in 2020/2021. Many folks found that new constraints allowed them to make decisions faster or have a stronger "knowing" about what they valued. Reflect and discover what matters most to you and how to thoughtfully take actions based on your inner compass.

3. BOUNDARIES: Empowered with appreciation and clarity, people are noticing where they need to set and hold boundaries around their time, energy and wellness. As the usual structures shifted, new opportunities to create centered and grounded decisions arose. Explore ways to honor schedules, plans and practices that have long-term benefits.

4. PACING: As a global society, we just spent a year in a "new normal" and it took months to adjust. It will take months to re-adjust to increased social interaction. Not everyone will move at the same pace. Check in with yourself about how quickly to move and when to take breaks.

5. DIGNITY: Collectively, we have experienced a major shake-up to the ways we live. It will take some time for us to recover as individuals and as a group. Honor your own dignity and the human dignity of others as we all find our way back to a more socially integrated society.

As we start to move back into a socially integrated society, there will be some challenges. Here are 5 tips for moving forward into reintegration.

Self-compassion is different than self-care. while both are important, self-compassion is about the inner dialogue you are listening to in your own head and how you feel about yourself as a result. Yes! Self-care is important but it is not the same as learning to turn to your inner critic with a clam and assertive boundary about the negative messages it is telling you.

I'm very excited to share SELF The Vast World Beyond Your Words. Ten years ago, Joel and I were walking around the Palace of Fine Arts and he told me he wanted to write a book. Joel had been a mentor and friend for a while and in that moment, I welled with emotion. I knew deep down that if his teachings and support could be put into pages, the gifts he had shared with me and his clients would be shared around the globe. After 40 years of coaching Joel and his wife Judy have put together an easy to read, fun and profoundly moving book. I've ready read it twice so far. It just gets better. I cannot recommend it enough.

In the coming weeks, I will also let you know about "book clubs" and webinars related to the book. Stay tuned!

https://www.amazon.com/Self-Vast-World-Beyond-Words/dp/0999832506/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1536780801&sr=8-1&keywords=Self+the+vast+world+beyond+your+words