Isitjosh

15 months ago my story almost came to an early end. Choosing to continue it was not easy. I found lower lows before I found the highs. I worked with a team of professionals to sort out my polypharma nightmare. This was not easy. Every single day has been a new challenge. I disappeared and let everything I worked so hard for slip away.

But I think it was necessary tbh. I had to break. My whole life has been like walking on thin ice. I needed it to shatter. I had to take the icy plunge, so that I could experience the joy of coming up for air.

Today is 15 months since I decided to stay. 14 months of continuous effort. 12 months of therapy. 8 months tapering off benzos. I have met new people, made new friends, experienced love, I've been creative, and I've been ALIVE.

Thanks for being here, thank you for supporting me. I hope this helps explain why I have been so absent and inconsistent. As a mental health advocate I felt like a fraud coming on here and lying to you all about my own mental health. Things got bad. But they are getting better.

I am alive. I am here. I am loved, and I am capable of loving.

And so are you. I love you all.

- Josh

Shout all my friends - but especially & for being my best friends, tour mates, and producers. for being my friend and rock in Philly. And for pushing me to be a better version of myself (and to eat fruit and veggies)

was a much needed break from reality. Grateful for the opportunity to leave civilization behind for a week, make new friends, and be surrounded by so much talent and musicianship. My fire has been re-lit!

Hi, I'm Josh. A lot of you impulse followed me from some of the viral videos I've posted in the past, and I wanted to make time for introductions. I'm a musician - I also make dumb (sometimes funny) videos and advocate for mental health awareness. Enough about me though, it's your turn - tell me what you're about!

It's 2016 and I'm bravely leading the mullet resurgence. Life was simple.
- My pop punk band was finally finding success after a LONG grind
- My beautiful Irish grandmother was alive and healthy and a bright spot in my life.
- I was a wood floor installer/refinisher teaching myself how to code and do digital marketing in my free time.
- My youngest brother hasn't had his anoxic brain injury yet and was always asking for tips on how to "be emo". He was getting into emo rap/SoundCloud rap and was actually pretty good!
- I was still wearing my old jewelery
- After my band broke up, I started a little YouTube cover channel just to keep doing music in some capacity.
- My friends didn't have families yet so we all still hung out and we went on our annual river float/camping trip for my birthday. These were my favorite trips.
- My Goku costume was a Halloween hit
- Started a post hardcore band at the end of the year and recorded a single that flew past 1 million streams...then we broke up 🤣

So much has changed and I am so so so happy with how my life has turned out. It's wild to look back and see how much has changed in the past ten years. Makes me excited for the next ten!

(Song I'm singing is Plane - Jason Mraz)