Sparrow Counseling

Sparrow Counseling

Sparrow Counseling is a place where individuals, couples and families can come to be strengthened, empowered and find hope again.

Operating as usual

Timeline Photos 01/12/2022

As Christians, we believe that we don’t get through this life without suffering or pain. As parents today we often have an uphill battle convincing our kids of that, because all they see on social media is their friends having fun, great, fulfilling lives. We know that’s not the truth, but they do not. So, help them pull back a bit and see the bigger picture in that everyone has pain. Some kids are living in alcoholic or abusive homes. Some families are struggling with health or financial issues. Divorce is part of their story, so how can they learn from it and eventually use it to help others? Also, this is an opportunity for them to learn coping skills. Model good coping skills for them, so they know how to cope with difficulties.

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3eqyLeP give us a call with any questions you have about helping your children grieve your divorce!

As Christians, we believe that we don’t get through this life without suffering or pain. As parents today we often have an uphill battle convincing our kids of that, because all they see on social media is their friends having fun, great, fulfilling lives. We know that’s not the truth, but they do not. So, help them pull back a bit and see the bigger picture in that everyone has pain. Some kids are living in alcoholic or abusive homes. Some families are struggling with health or financial issues. Divorce is part of their story, so how can they learn from it and eventually use it to help others? Also, this is an opportunity for them to learn coping skills. Model good coping skills for them, so they know how to cope with difficulties.

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3eqyLeP give us a call with any questions you have about helping your children grieve your divorce!

Timeline Photos 01/12/2022

Grief is exhausting, but kids still need to play and so do you! Playing can be watching a movie together, coloring, going to the park, or having friends over for take-out. It does not need to be extravagant. As a parent going through divorce, you are walking through your own grief and your kids are watching. Having a time to laugh and play may feel like too much, but it will help reassure the kids that all of you are going to be OK. A caution, though, to those parents that always want to play, it is important that you do not become a “Disneyland parent”. Providing stability with discipline and allowing some downtime for them to grieve is helpful.

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3eqyLeP give us a call with any questions you have about helping your children grieve your divorce!

Grief is exhausting, but kids still need to play and so do you! Playing can be watching a movie together, coloring, going to the park, or having friends over for take-out. It does not need to be extravagant. As a parent going through divorce, you are walking through your own grief and your kids are watching. Having a time to laugh and play may feel like too much, but it will help reassure the kids that all of you are going to be OK. A caution, though, to those parents that always want to play, it is important that you do not become a “Disneyland parent”. Providing stability with discipline and allowing some downtime for them to grieve is helpful.

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3eqyLeP give us a call with any questions you have about helping your children grieve your divorce!

Timeline Photos 01/10/2022

Stability is important when children are young. Keeping to a fixed schedule helps children and the parent stick to a particular rhythm in this new normal. Children will learn at a VERY early age which parent can be manipulated out of the schedule. If you are effectively coparenting together, this will make it harder.

Keeping children on the same schedule in terms of bedtimes and naptimes is also key. This is not the time to make a power play and keep the child up, so he will be cranky for the other parent. You are only hurting your child. Let your child rest. As coparents, come up with a fairly set schedule of mealtime, naptimes, and bedtimes and work within that as a framework in terms of the best interest of your child. Remember to adhere to the "spirit of the law" and not the "letter of the law". In other words, some flexibility is OK for special events, but making this a regular practice only hurts the child as well as the coparenting relationship you are trying to build.

Tips for Coparenting Schedules when they are Young:

stick to a schedule you and your coparent decided on for mealtimes and nap times

young children need and want routine and stability

kids learn early how to manipulate their parents and it isn't cute or funny

if you are trying to "win" against your coparent, you are hurting your child, your coparent (score!) but guess what- yourself too! (say what?) You will have no peace between fighting your coparent or trying new ways to figure out how to "win" your child over. Aren't you exhausted?

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3mC0P3g give us a call with any questions you have about coparenting!

Stability is important when children are young. Keeping to a fixed schedule helps children and the parent stick to a particular rhythm in this new normal. Children will learn at a VERY early age which parent can be manipulated out of the schedule. If you are effectively coparenting together, this will make it harder.

Keeping children on the same schedule in terms of bedtimes and naptimes is also key. This is not the time to make a power play and keep the child up, so he will be cranky for the other parent. You are only hurting your child. Let your child rest. As coparents, come up with a fairly set schedule of mealtime, naptimes, and bedtimes and work within that as a framework in terms of the best interest of your child. Remember to adhere to the "spirit of the law" and not the "letter of the law". In other words, some flexibility is OK for special events, but making this a regular practice only hurts the child as well as the coparenting relationship you are trying to build.

Tips for Coparenting Schedules when they are Young:

stick to a schedule you and your coparent decided on for mealtimes and nap times

young children need and want routine and stability

kids learn early how to manipulate their parents and it isn't cute or funny

if you are trying to "win" against your coparent, you are hurting your child, your coparent (score!) but guess what- yourself too! (say what?) You will have no peace between fighting your coparent or trying new ways to figure out how to "win" your child over. Aren't you exhausted?

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3mC0P3g give us a call with any questions you have about coparenting!

Timeline Photos 01/07/2022

Last week, we introduced you to Discernment Counseling (DC). If a couple chooses DC, there are 3 paths they can take:

1) Stay in the marriage as it is

2) Separation/divorce

3) A 6-month reconciliation period with an all-out effort in couple’s therapy with divorce off the table

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3z49252 us a call with any questions you have about Discernment Counseling!

Last week, we introduced you to Discernment Counseling (DC). If a couple chooses DC, there are 3 paths they can take:

1) Stay in the marriage as it is

2) Separation/divorce

3) A 6-month reconciliation period with an all-out effort in couple’s therapy with divorce off the table

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3z49252 us a call with any questions you have about Discernment Counseling!

Timeline Photos 01/05/2022

Oftentimes just talking with someone will often relieve people’s anxiety, especially for kids. Kids can often have physical symptoms like stomachaches and headaches as a result of stress. Parents, you cannot fix your divorce or your kid’s stress, but you can actively listen to how they feel. So saying things like, “Hmm I wonder why you’re so angry today?” or “I’m so sorry, I know this hurts. Can I sit with you for a little while? We don’t have to talk. I just don’t want you to be alone right now.” If your parents are divorced, you can relate to their feelings then tell them stories about how you felt as a divorced kid. If not, than don’t say you understand, because you don’t know what it feels like to give up a parent every other week or weekend. So empathize. Brene Brown has a great video on the difference between sympathy and empathy.

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3eqyLeP give us a call with any questions you have about helping children grieve your divorce!

Oftentimes just talking with someone will often relieve people’s anxiety, especially for kids. Kids can often have physical symptoms like stomachaches and headaches as a result of stress. Parents, you cannot fix your divorce or your kid’s stress, but you can actively listen to how they feel. So saying things like, “Hmm I wonder why you’re so angry today?” or “I’m so sorry, I know this hurts. Can I sit with you for a little while? We don’t have to talk. I just don’t want you to be alone right now.” If your parents are divorced, you can relate to their feelings then tell them stories about how you felt as a divorced kid. If not, than don’t say you understand, because you don’t know what it feels like to give up a parent every other week or weekend. So empathize. Brene Brown has a great video on the difference between sympathy and empathy.

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3eqyLeP give us a call with any questions you have about helping children grieve your divorce!

Timeline Photos 01/03/2022

It is important that you say your goodbyes and give your hugs ahead of time before you actually transition to the other parent. Tell your child this before the transition. It makes it difficult on the child if you do this at the time of the transition. Make the transition as quick and positive as possible. Also, make sure you speak to the other parent in a positive, upbeat manner. Do not have ANY emotional conversation with your coparent. This is ALL about your child and ONLY about your child. Your time for conversations need to be saved for emails and phone calls. You are the grown-ups. Act like it. The more relaxed you are the more relaxed your child will be. Pay attention not only to your words because that is only 10% of how you communicate. Your body language is 90% of how you communicate. Also, give your child about 30 minutes of time to get acclimated back into your home. Don't plan anything. Don't get on the phone. Be present and relaxed.

Tips for Coparenting with Goodbyes and Hellos:

Don't linger with long heartfelt goodbyes. This makes kids feel guilty.

Relax, so your child can relax

Keep it short and sweet

Be positive

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3essoaU and give us a call with any questions you have about coparenting!

It is important that you say your goodbyes and give your hugs ahead of time before you actually transition to the other parent. Tell your child this before the transition. It makes it difficult on the child if you do this at the time of the transition. Make the transition as quick and positive as possible. Also, make sure you speak to the other parent in a positive, upbeat manner. Do not have ANY emotional conversation with your coparent. This is ALL about your child and ONLY about your child. Your time for conversations need to be saved for emails and phone calls. You are the grown-ups. Act like it. The more relaxed you are the more relaxed your child will be. Pay attention not only to your words because that is only 10% of how you communicate. Your body language is 90% of how you communicate. Also, give your child about 30 minutes of time to get acclimated back into your home. Don't plan anything. Don't get on the phone. Be present and relaxed.

Tips for Coparenting with Goodbyes and Hellos:

Don't linger with long heartfelt goodbyes. This makes kids feel guilty.

Relax, so your child can relax

Keep it short and sweet

Be positive

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3essoaU and give us a call with any questions you have about coparenting!

Timeline Photos 12/31/2021

Are you tired, lonely and scared when it comes to thinking of your marriage? Are you tired of wondering what is next for the future of your family? What about the kids? Are you worried about them and all the fights they see or hear between you or your spouse? Or maybe you are good at not fighting in front of them, but you just don’t like being around your spouse and THAT becomes a hard thing to cover up. In fact, it becomes draining. You are tired of faking it and you are ready for a decision about the future of your marriage. Whose really in the marriage and who is leaning out of the marriage? Maybe you have tried couples counseling and that really did not give you the direction you were looking for. But divorce feels so final and significant for everyone. Is there some middle ground where you and your spouse can be honest with each other and if you really see a hopeful future?

This is where Discernment counseling (DC) can help. It is for couples on the brink of divorce that seem caught in the same conversations with no solutions. It is for those couples that are exasperated by their relationship and need a third party that can help them find some answers. The goal of DC is finding more clarity and confidence in the decision the couple is making about the future of their marriage. This comes from learning together what happened to cause the breakdown of the marriage and each person’s part in the breakdown. There is a very clear distinction between marriage counseling and discernment counseling. Marriage counseling can go on for in undefined amount of time until the couple feels like their communication about their problems have improved or been solved. Discernment counseling is looking to see are the couple’s problems solvable. The deeper work occurs when couples have one-on-one sessions with the counselor.

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3sCHMti give us a call with any questions you have about Discernment Counseling!

Are you tired, lonely and scared when it comes to thinking of your marriage? Are you tired of wondering what is next for the future of your family? What about the kids? Are you worried about them and all the fights they see or hear between you or your spouse? Or maybe you are good at not fighting in front of them, but you just don’t like being around your spouse and THAT becomes a hard thing to cover up. In fact, it becomes draining. You are tired of faking it and you are ready for a decision about the future of your marriage. Whose really in the marriage and who is leaning out of the marriage? Maybe you have tried couples counseling and that really did not give you the direction you were looking for. But divorce feels so final and significant for everyone. Is there some middle ground where you and your spouse can be honest with each other and if you really see a hopeful future?

This is where Discernment counseling (DC) can help. It is for couples on the brink of divorce that seem caught in the same conversations with no solutions. It is for those couples that are exasperated by their relationship and need a third party that can help them find some answers. The goal of DC is finding more clarity and confidence in the decision the couple is making about the future of their marriage. This comes from learning together what happened to cause the breakdown of the marriage and each person’s part in the breakdown. There is a very clear distinction between marriage counseling and discernment counseling. Marriage counseling can go on for in undefined amount of time until the couple feels like their communication about their problems have improved or been solved. Discernment counseling is looking to see are the couple’s problems solvable. The deeper work occurs when couples have one-on-one sessions with the counselor.

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3sCHMti give us a call with any questions you have about Discernment Counseling!

Timeline Photos 12/29/2021

Divorce can be very disorienting to children. They are confused, sad, and angry. Often children of divorce feel powerless as so much of their life changes. With kids of divorce, their life changes more than the parents because they have to make frequent transitions between two homes. Children have a lot to grieve over their parent’s divorce. Even many years after the divorce, adult children of divorce still worry about managing their divorced parents over the holidays. Which parent gets to have their adult children and grandchildren at Christmas? There is no enforceable divorce decree, so how do these adult children make both parents happy, while still caring for themselves? Divorce impacts children for their lifetime.

We love this picture because it speaks to the messiness of grief. Therefore, as you are dealing with your messy grief, your kids have theirs as well. It is important to be patient with you and your kids, but knowledge is power. Help them prepare for this journey by explaining what they may experience. Be patient with yourself and them. Divorce always seems to add another layer of grief or change, when new circumstances arise.

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3eqyLeP give us a call with any questions you have about helping children grieve your divorce!

Divorce can be very disorienting to children. They are confused, sad, and angry. Often children of divorce feel powerless as so much of their life changes. With kids of divorce, their life changes more than the parents because they have to make frequent transitions between two homes. Children have a lot to grieve over their parent’s divorce. Even many years after the divorce, adult children of divorce still worry about managing their divorced parents over the holidays. Which parent gets to have their adult children and grandchildren at Christmas? There is no enforceable divorce decree, so how do these adult children make both parents happy, while still caring for themselves? Divorce impacts children for their lifetime.

We love this picture because it speaks to the messiness of grief. Therefore, as you are dealing with your messy grief, your kids have theirs as well. It is important to be patient with you and your kids, but knowledge is power. Help them prepare for this journey by explaining what they may experience. Be patient with yourself and them. Divorce always seems to add another layer of grief or change, when new circumstances arise.

You can find the rest of the blog here: https://buff.ly/3eqyLeP give us a call with any questions you have about helping children grieve your divorce!

Videos (show all)

Meet our new Clinician, Jennifer Griffith
Meet my new clinician, Roy Martin!
Two counselors talking about life in a pandemic.
COVID-19 and Faith- a discussion with counselors!
Fatih in the midst of COVID-19!
Fatih in the midst of COVID-19!
Help!  The anxiety is too much.  Here are some breathing techniques you can try!
Counselors discussing coping strategies for COVID19
Helping Coparents navigate COVID-19
Helping Coparents navigate COVID-19
Counselors talk about how to deal with a Mother's Day hangover!

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2917 Central Ave, Ste 305
Homewood, AL
35209

Opening Hours

Tuesday 8am - 7pm
Wednesday 8am - 7pm
Thursday 8am - 7pm
Friday 8am - 1pm
Other Divorce & Family Lawyers in Homewood (show all)
Birmingham Law Group Birmingham Law Group
242 W Valley Ave Ste 304
Homewood, 35209

Birmingham Law Group is located in Homewood, Alabama.