Message Therapy

Message Therapy

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Message Therapy is the non-invasive healing of ailing prose by Robert Sutherland: The Message Therapist. I am chiropractor of communication.

"Message Therapy" is more than merely pointing out any ailments in your writing. I gently work the kinks out of disjointed writing and align thoughts to make them flow more smoothly. Message Therapy retains your voice, releases your creativity and relieves your stress.

She Gets Calls And Texts Meant For Elon Musk. Some Are Pretty Weird 05/21/2020

Clever journalism at its finest, in my humble opinion.

I thought I was texting Elon Musk.

But a 25-year-old woman who works at a Sephora in Silicon Valley replied.

Apparently this happens to her every single day.

So I did a story on her:

She Gets Calls And Texts Meant For Elon Musk. Some Are Pretty Weird Lyndsay Tucker, who works at a Sephora beauty store in San Jose, Calif., has tech billionaire Elon Musk's old cellphone number. So every day, she fields calls and texts intended for him.

05/29/2018

When your wife comes home from the hospital, it's nice to welcome her with a sweet Tweet. It's even better ... if you spell her name correctly.

01/15/2018

Afraid you could never be skilled enough to write copy worthy of being posted on the Internet?

Pffft. Someone with an IQ in single digits was paid for this. How much worse could you possibly write?

"Keep in mind that the average IQ for someone who is considered to be of normal intelligence is between 95 and 105 – that means that there are definitely more than one person on this list that have the vast majority of us beat when it comes to what is going on inside their head at any given time."

Photos from Message Therapy's post 06/23/2017

Aced this OCD test.
What would you expect of The Message Therapist? My clients expect perfection and that requires a perfect score on such tests.

Timeline photos 04/15/2017

Shouldn't The Gainesville Times newspaper be able to spell "Gainesville" correctly?

Timeline photos 04/07/2017
Liar, liar? Florida lawyer's pants catch fire — during arson trial 03/09/2017

So, was the lawyer lying when his pants caught fire?

Florida Lawyer's Pants Catch Fire During Arson Trial http://nbcnews.to/2m6PU0d

Liar, liar? Florida lawyer's pants catch fire — during arson trial Defense attorney Stephen Gutierrez was in a Miami-Dade courtroom on Wednesday when his pants started smoking.

Timeline photos 01/26/2017

Dear Stupid Crooks,

You could make more money with your scams if you hired me to edit your crooked pitches.

To contact me, call the FBI. They'll forward your message to me.

Thanks,

The Message Therapist

Police trade Twitter barbs over controversial finish of Kansas State-KU game 01/07/2017

Now, cops post the best Tweets!

http://www.kansascity.com/sports/spt-columns-blogs/for-petes-sake/article124553379.html

Police trade Twitter barbs over controversial finish of Kansas State-KU game The Lawrence Police Department, the Riley County Police Department and the KU Public Safety Office had funny tweets in the wake of Kansas’ 90-88 win over Kansas State in the Sunflower Showdown on Tuesday.

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