Partnering Through Loss Coaching

This is honestly what “MAN’ing up”feels like and sounds like sometime. Let’s slow down, get that week back down to seven days if you know what I mean? Stand down some times brothers, it’s time to Man Down

This doesn’t stop after horrible loss, and it doesn’t get quieter. Neither should you.

When grief sets in, so does doubt, with doubt comes fear and that inner roommate just lives itself some fear. You are not your worst thoughts. You’re just their audience. You are still valuable. You still matter

Couldn’t say it better myself. This is why removing the stigma and the shame, that comes from not talking about our losses and our loves or not feeling able or allowed to, is so important. Let’s talk about it, feel though it might; it can’t hurt

Commonly while grieving the loss of a loved one, the griever will observe that they feel like there is this wall dividing their life before and what they thought it could be and then there is there life now, with the grief. As we move between feelings of loss and feelings of restoration we will encounter these moments, memories, scenarios where that wall will seem to be invisible and we view “what might have been”.

It’s then that the pain comes.

It’s my belief that in honouring that feeling, feeling it and acknowledging it we can hold on to the love and release the pain

I’d love to help you too

I think it’s a pretty safe bet to say no one wants to be in pain forever and that there are days where it feels like I just don’t have the space or capacity for one more moment of pain at losing her. BUT I will have endless space for HER as her dad forever. Just because we don’t want to hurt anymore doesn’t mean we don’t love our lost ones, or that we care less……we’re just human, and that’s ok.

When does it get too much for you?

It’s amazing what brings the waves of grief back. Our daughter died in 2020 at 27 days. What this has caused in the present is this incredible anxiety for the first 27 days of my subsequent children’s lives.

I can’t speak for my partner but I can say that for me it was almost a month of wondering “will she stay?” “Is she safe?”, of sudden panic in the night. I also wasn’t prepared for the guilt and anxiety that comes realizing that B and M both have now lived longer than we got L for. This incredible resentment that I was robbed of so much.

I know this feeling will pass, but the anger is real and this grief is real, and that’s ok.

What do you do when the waves come back?

Let’s talk about it together here. Booking link in my bio

It’s been my honour to hold space for partners for almost three years now. Our next group is week away on the 6th of July.

I invite any partner looking for extra support navigating the isolating power of grief and loss to attend

It’s an honour to hold space

Register here: https://pilsc.org/get-support/groups-navigator/partners-in-loss-peer-support-groups/

Sometimes it’s easier to think surrounded by the water. Easier to remember and easier to grieve.

Where do you like to grieve?

What a blessing to get to participate yesterday with and their second legacy run/walk. Getting to see all the amazingly resilient loss parents and supporters makes my heart full. It was amazing to see in person and the amazing . The work the amazing team at PILSC are doing is immense and so needed. Can’t wait to do it again. This truly was an example of anything mentionable being manageable and how together we can make this journey easier and gentler. Oh and .and.company thank you for my new daily mantra