Schwenkmeyer Coaching

On New Year's Eve day, my 17-year old daughter, my husband, and I planned to wake up at 6:00 a.m. to drive home from Washington DC to Boston. We collectively agreed that leaving early was our best hope of avoiding New York City traffic. My daughter, typically not interested in rising early, was motivated to make her dinner reservations in the city that night and party to follow, so she agreed to leave early in the morning, no problem. As soon as we started planning our trip home, my mother itch began…that itch that keeps me from keeping my mouth shut and minding my own business. “You know, I am not going to deny myself a p*e break because you might be late to dinner. I think you should text your friends and get real that you probably won’t make it to dinner. Don’t be that friend that is dodgy with plans.” My daughter wanted none of it, and responded with something I would say, “Mom, my dinner plans are in my bucket, not yours.” Damn. She was sassy and also so right. It was time to heed my own advice.

By “buckets,” she was referring to something my sister taught me that I use all the time in my house. It’s the idea that everything in life can be categorized into1 of 3 buckets.

*Bucket #1 is about your own business
*Bucket #2 is about other people’s business
*Bucket #3 is about “God’s” business (like the weather and other things out of your control)

My daughter’s management of her New Year’s Eve plans belonged in her bucket, not mine. Dinner in the city was her plan, not mine. Her communication with her friends was her responsibility, not mine. Putting her evening’s plans into my bucket caused me to feel stress and anticipated resentment that I might not be able to stop and p*e. By dipping into her bucket a few things went south. I treated her like she was incapable of managing her own plans and friendships, and I was a helicopter parent at that moment!

Consider something that is causing you to feel unsettled, stressed, or maybe a little anxious. Maybe that something does not belong in bucket #1?

So fun to be with the seniors this morning! We talked about how thoughts are a direct link to feelings and ways to manage that nagging inner critic we all have.

A short piece about our negativity bias.

Rain or Rainbow? — Schwenkmeyer Coaching Our brains have what psychologists call a negativity bias. We are hard-wired to give more attention to negative experiences than we are to remember positive experiences. Last week, a good friend was preparing for a trip to California for a family reunion. Her anticipated excitement shifted to fea

"The proposition here is not that you should be rendered by mindfulness into some lifeless, non-judgemental blog. The proposition is that you can learn how to respond wisely to things that happen to you rather than reacting blindly."

Why Mindfulness Is A Superpower Practicing mindfulness is one of the single most powerful things you can do for your wellbeing. Want to give it a try? Visit http://www.happify.com for guided meditations…

Education is so much more than taking classes. Learn how academic coaching can help you feel more purposeful and achieve success in school.

www.schwenkmeyercoaching.com

Got a student who's feeling emotionally and/or academically overwhelmed? Who struggles with executive functioning, time management and/or procrastination?
I'm offering a special on my 20-week semester-long package. There are a lot of ups and downs throughout a semester, and having an academic coach to support and help hold a student accountable for the duration of a semester is a sure bet for sustained, positive change-academically and emotionally.
www.schwenkmeyercoaching.com

Part of my work as an Academic Coach is helping students learn how to manage their emotional well-being. Check out part 1 of my 3 part series "Become the Boss of Your Own Mind" to learn more!
Shout out to the visual artists at Slimy Oddity!

Become the Boss of You Mind-part 1 — Schwenkmeyer Coaching Students I work with tell me they want to “get rid” of their anxiety. Many describe how their imagination plays out worst-case scenarios or how they make decisions based on FOMO or how their procrastination is stressing them out. These feelings of anxiety and stress prohibit a student from feeli...

Have a student challenged with ADHD? Curious about how coaching can help?

“Having an understanding, compassionate person who can help guide you through difficult situations, who understands your brain and can work with you to overcome challenges, or even just a person who you can vent to without judgment, has given me back so much self-esteem and confidence.”

How ADHD Coaching – from a Distance – is Getting Us Through This Pandemic Remote learning stress. Lack of structure and productivity. Off-the-charts anxiety. This pandemic has inflamed a wide range of challenges. And now many adults and adolescents are turning to ADHD coaching for its judgement-free nature and practical strategies — invaluable in these times.

Mental Health Day! Today @12!