Omwandho OKOTH

BLIND DATE GONE WRONG. TAFADHALI TUACHANE NA NYUMBA HATULIPII RENT.

When I was offline, a lady called me akanishow tumeet. Unfortunately, dryspell was almost taking my life so nikatafuta fare mbio mbio and I met her in Nyeri.

She refused to send her pictures so I went there like a blind date. All along she flirted me very nastly na Mimi nikaplay along juu heh, sijui k**a mliskia ule jamaa mkisiii aliuliwa na dryspell.

When I got to Nyeri, she called me na akaniambia nimpate kwa stage ya juu. I obliged and mehn, she had a car.

Ndo Mimi huyooo, kwa Toyota yake and my Google maps enlightened me Ati tumeelekea Chaka.

She was cute though but old. Let's say she was in her 40s. Mimi k**a kijana mzuri, nikamwambia tusimame kwanza nishike ka energy drink tondu nie maaa, energy is very important at that moment.

Tukasimama kwa hoteli Fulani and I judged my fate, that this is it. Huku ndo Emirates. This is where the World Cup final will happen.

Damn, to my surprise she ordered food na tukakula na nikashiba.

Akanimarinate na Tusker tatu and now I was ready for the biggest champions league match in history, you get it, yaani ni blind date alafu the lady is rich and she is cute.

Call it a jack pot. I was a bit tipsy but very vigilant. Any weird thing and I run away.

When I looked around, nikaona Kila mtu Ako kwa simu, not sure what they were reading but something was very clear...

Walikuwa wanasoma story za jaba k**a wewe tu. Yaani setbook haungefika page 2 k**a hujalala but here you are on Facebook ukisoma story za ufala na hazimek sense.

Btw, shame on you. Ungekuwa serious ivi kwa masomo labda ungekuwa pilot saiii.

Grow up.