Pilgrim Within

Men’s work should be mandatory..
Men Do you disagree? Do you know what men’s work is? Do you want to see change in this world?

Let’s talk about it!

It’s important to know that men’s work is nothing to do with construction, it’s not just talking circles.. it’s a place where men are put to work on their self, their shadow and start to build capacity to hold themselves accountable to them self for the betterment of themselves and others in this world. And the men in the circle hold you to it.

I really believe this work is how we can start to see change within these issues we see in this patriarchal system that is destroying woman and men.

But it takes work! It takes repetition, and not every space is gonna suit you but there’s loads of different styles out there that you can find the space for you to do the work and make change in your self.

Just like the gym, you’ll find the one you like.

.ie .unmaskedman .ie .men


I heard from recently say, “we aren’t here to change the world, we are here to change worlds”

Each man has a world of his own, his family, his work, his community.

We can be the change in our worlds.

My father Roy Arbuckle was one of most influential singer songwriters and performers on this island of Ireland.

Especially through out the 90’s and early 00’s he led the band Different Drums of Ireland to tour around the world and spread the message of unity through music by bringing together cultural instruments from different religions and traditions, most notably the Catholic Bodhran and Protestant Lambeg drum.

They were dubbed “the musical wing of the peace process”

Dad passed away this year in March and has left behind a legacy and many broken hearts that miss him deeply.

In process of his passing I found great healing and comfort in singing his songs.

He lives on through these soulful and healing songs and writings that I intend to continue sharing and promoting as they are of peace, unity and love for this island and all communities on it which I too am so passionate about, thanks to how he raised me.

Dad loved to quote the Dalia Lama “kindness is my religion”

Here I sing unaccompanied “gentle days” a song he wrote about Ireland.

I have linked his band camp in my bio, you can listen and buy the vast majority of his work there.

All across this land
The sun shone warm and beautiful
In the gentle days
And the children ran
In pastures so plentiful
In the gentle days

My lovers eyes
Were soft and kind and wonderfilled
In the gentle days
She filled my soul
Love was sweet and words were wise
In the gentle days

Then cmae the troubled times
And fear stalked like a hungry wolf
And the children cried
Calling all their gods
People prayed to providence
In the fearful full times

Now my memoried heart
Sees pastures so plentiful
And the gentle days
And all their dreams we dream
Are visions of a better place
Come the gentle days

June is

I offer my poem “I’m better now for it” hoping that it may relate to your experience as a man and give some hope as this phrase is a helpful tool for me.

I feel so blessed to be able to express in this way but it wasn’t always like this and it still isn’t easy. It took so much work and still takes a lot to be seen in this way.

It is important to know that the struggle to express ourself comes from deep societal conditioning that takes work to recondition.

But! there is so much freedom in expression!

In this poem I explore my process of reframing the struggles and remembering that it all the tough, the boring and exciting parts of life all help shape me and are opportunities for learning and growth.. it doesn’t make it any easier to navigate but it helps to off load it all and create space and capacity for the challenges that inevitably are waiting for me in life.

Take every chance you can to express what is moving in your inner world and let the world see it, may that be a friend or people online, people at an open mic.

Creativity, talking to friends, therapy, wellness retreats, men’s circles, your cat or dog, being with nature .. these places, spaces and people are all safe opportunities to express what needs to move through!

If you know any men who need help or spaces like this my self and the following people and organisations are dedicated to creating these important spaces for men to express.

.ie .unmaskedman

Tag the men you know doing the work to heal the masculine wound so more men heal

One week away from immersion in Belfast and I have been reflecting on the importance of recognising cycles that are occurring in our life, our community and in the world.

We have the opportunity in our life time to brake unhealthy and toxic cycles that are playing out in our world.

This is the power of men’s work and the opportunity to do it is next weekend in Belfast!

Join us! Link in bio

“When we are in the troubled times we ask for the gentle days to come back again” - Roy Arbuckle

We invite you to gather this Beltaine at An Grianán of Aileach in the collective spirit of welcoming gentle days.

(Family friendly event!)

Our intention is to collectively gather for peace, unity and healing through celebration with community, song, sharing, story, poetry and the lighting of the Beltaine flame (candles) ceremony.

This event is in aid of our land guardians and all the vitally important work they are doing for our land.

Saturday 9th of May

Gathering at 6:30PM
Beginning at An Grianán Hotel car park
Pilgrimage is optional, People are welcome to join us at the top around 7:30pm

Bring a candle, food and instruments.

7:40pm Food and music poetry and story for celebration of Beltaine

8:40 sunset - fire (candles) ceremony

(IMPORTANT)
• This is a sober and family friendly event
• An Grianán will be respected and honoured throughout - leave no trace
•This is not a protest
• make sure to follow the link in bio to book a free ticket on Eventbrite as more information will be sent out via email 🙏

Grá mor ❤️🔥🌞🌀✨