Divorce with a difference, we can help you navigate your way through separation and divorce.
Operating as usual
Is your child anxious? Does your child say 'I hate you?' Are you worried about the transition into secondary school? Does your child think they need to be perfect?
The charity Place2Be have launched a new service for parents. Parenting Smart is a site that is packed with practical advice and tried-and-tested tips for and of primary age .
This is excellent news!
"How does the complex issue of maintenance work?' is a common challenge put to us, and in this blog Family Law Partners Director Lisa Burton-Durham provides an insight into a topic so contentious it often makes headlines: http://ow.ly/ToMt50EEkOL
"The way someone else perceives what you do is a result of their own experiences (which you can’t control), their own preferences (which you can’t predict), and their own expectations (which you don’t set).
If your choices don’t match their expectations that is their concern, not yours."
Are you co-parenting under the same roof?
Here are some tips that may help
Create a routine – Kids thrive on routine and structure is especially important now. That means time to play, to virtually socialise, exercise and home school.
One parent in charge – only one of you can be in charge at any given time. Learn to divide whose parenting time it is and stay out of the way or don’t get involved when its not your turn. This is good training for when you are separated parents physically as well as emotionally.
Set ground rules – you may have different rules in different houses once you separate physically but for now you need one set and you need to agree the rules together. Bedtimes, wake times, screen times, routines, etc
Manage your own mental health – managing your own frustrations at this time is key. Stay connected to friends and family and keep talking. Apps that encourage meditation are great and can help reduce frustration and anxiety.
This podcast is worth listening to, Paulette describes her experience of the divorce process.
The Smart Divorce Podcast - Bonus Episode: Real Divore Stories - Paulette Tamsin speaks to Paulette, who has come through divorce recently and wants to share her experiences. She talks about the importance of self care and of using the right professionals. She also speaks of her experiences of working with Tamsin and the benefits she found. Paulette - Independent social w...
Happy Easter everyone!
Let us not forget the single parents that work tirelessly for their children 🌷
Single Parents Day: How To Support The Single Parents In Your Life This Single Parents Day Rebecca Cox says there are a number of ways you can help to support and help friends and family who are single parents. Read more.
Our Horsham Team include a mediator and collaborative solicitor who can help separating couples manage their issues in a non-confrontational way and find long-term solutions that really work for the family. Find out more about this option: http://ow.ly/IKdv50CgGqD
On the blog this week, Senior Associate Solicitor, Gemma Garrett discusses Divorce Jurisdiction after Brexit and highlights the changes to the position regarding which Court has the power to determine a dispute, which was previously governed by EU law. http://ow.ly/hy6u50DQUH2
'You worry you'll be seen as weak': single dads in their own words – a photo essay From teaching them to ride bikes to overcoming unimaginable grief, Harry Borden’s portraits reveal the intimate bonds that grow between single fathers and their children
It is Family Mediation week;
If you are going through separation or divorce, then mediation is a really helpful route to taken you towards a more positive future.
• Work with a family consultant to help you prepare for the mediation process
• You can make decisions as a couple about your parenting and financial future.
• Some mediators will meet with your children and ask them for their thoughts and feelings about the separation
Did you know that today is Ditch New Years’ Resolutions Day?
WHAT RESOLUTIONS ARE YOU GOING TO DITCH?
We often try to introduce a new habit like starting the couch to 5k in the most dark and cold month of the year.
In order for new habits to stick we need to make them really small and attach them to habits we are already doing. If I want to start to do yoga every morning, I will be more likely to be successful if I do it after an existing habit, for example after I have brushed my teeth.
When I leave my yoga until later in the day things often get in the way.
If we are trying to give up a deep-rooted habit we need to consider what emotions that habit is fulfilling, what feelings may arise if I give that habit up.
Start slowly and set yourself goals that you are likely to meet each day, you will feel great!
Really important message .......
Did you know that today is World Introvert Day?
Introverts may be feeling very exhausted after the festivities and feel a need to retreat to a peaceful place to recover.
If you are interested in reading more about the subject Susan Cain's book "Quiet" is worth a read. Cain argues that "we make a grave mistake to embrace the Extrovert Ideal".....
Quiet Quiet, the Sunday Times and New York Times Bestseller by Susan Cain, will permanently change how we see introverts - and how you see yourself. Our lives are driven by a fact most of us can't name and don't understand: whether we're an introvert or an extrovert. This defines who our friends and lover...
Some useful tips on pension in divorce from Hargreaves Lansdown.
Knowing what you have, and what your options are could make things a lot easier further down the line.
Why divorce could cost you your pension – three tips to think about Pensions & Divorce - We look at why overlooking your pension now could lead to financial hardship in retirement.
FREE WORKSHEET: Create your spending plan for divorce or separation 👈
I’m glad to say that after seeing the needs of my clients in this area, I’ve put together a free resource to help you get to grips with the cash flow in your new life.
By this I mean a budget, or spending plan, which can play a key role in a financial settlement too.
I have many divorce clients who come along and ask me to help them create a budget, and who are often feeling anxious about the prospect, especially if they have not managed the money in the relationship before.
If this sounds like you, have a look at the link in the comments.
-- Kim Crewe
Some useful tips before starting the divorce process.
Good Divorce Week 2020. Day 2: How does it start? | Lexology Good Divorce Week, which began yesterday, is an annual campaign that aims to promote practical and constructive ways for separating parents to put…
Did you know it’s important in your divorce process to do a spending plan? 📝❗
Yet money can be a challenge at the best of times, and divorce can certainly add a whole other emotional layer (as you may be experiencing). So how do we navigate this and create a budget for life after separation or divorce?
I recently co-wrote a blog post with Gemma Hope, who is a Solicitor, Collaborative Lawyer and Mediator at Family Law Partners (thank you Gemma for sharing your expertise!)
Give it a read for:
✔️ the practical and emotional aspects of your spending plan for divorce
✔️ top tips
✔️ a free worksheet, so you can get started
If you have questions, or would like support to feel more confident about your spending plan, do please send me a private message.
I specialise in supporting people with their money during separation, and I’m here to help you.
-- Kim Crewe
Divorce and financial coach
Creating a budget for life after separation or divorce: step by step guide - Separation Options Creating a spending plan will help you feel organised about your financial future. It's also a key part of a financial settlement.
This is Good Divorce week!
I can help couples to plan their separation, put together parenting arrangements that will suit their children and then introduce them to solicitors who will work collaboratively with them to find a solution that will suit the whole family.
DIY divorce for 60 per cent of couples who take their dispute to court Courts are being overloaded with tens of thousands of “DIY divorces” as nearly 60 per cent of those going before a judge litigate without lawyers.Research seen by The Times shows that people
Watch this award winning film, it will take just one minute of your day and then please share.
A powerful and moving 1 minute film made by an Iranian filmaker.
I would love to hear your comments.
Beautiful Iranian short film 1 minute Award winning winner of film festival - Thursday Appointment Please Like 👍🏼, Share ↪️ & Subscribe👆🏿Thursday Appointment Award-Winning Beautiful Iranian 1 min short film Written & directed by Sayed Mohammad Reza Khe...
As a result of Covid-19 many people are having to renegotiate their Child Maintenance payments.
Wealthy use Covid uncertainty to challenge divorce settlements Economic confusion makes it hard to value assets and results in cases being reopened
Listen to the voices of young people to their parents going through divorce very powerful
Advice to Parents from Children of Divorce These older children discuss their experiences with their parents' divorces. This video is part of The Successful Co-Parenting After Divorce Toolkit.
A helpful video from Louise Witney discussing the mediator's "impartiality", it doesn't mean not saying anything... http://ed.gr/nhmo
Secrets and impartiality Impartiality is a crucial part of a mediator's role, as is not keeping secrets. But how does this work in practice?
Is the term "emotional abuse" becoming over used?
I discovered my wife plans on divorce – and accuses me of abuse Get a mediator involved, says Mariella Frostrup. There is clearly a huge difference between your understanding of your relationship and your wife’s
Really useful post about what to expect in divorce.
What to expect in divorce Although there is some anecdotal evidence suggesting lockdown may lead to an...
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